In seduction, the attraction is that feeling, surrounded by a series of sensations, that leads us to desire another person.
WHY DOES ATTRACTION EXIST?
Attraction exists to make us reproduce: it is the mechanism that nature has given us to perpetuate the species.
If woman and man were not attracted to each other there would be no offspring, and therefore the human species would end.
What determines whether or not we are attracted to a person?
Generally speaking, we are attracted to people who have high reproductive ando survival value.
So we are attracted to :
1. Those people that have particular characteristics,that indicate to us that by being with a particular person,our survival,and the one of our kids, will be favored
2. Those characteristics that indicate to us that a person has "good" genes, and consequently by having children with that person, there is a good chance that these "good" genes,will be transmitted to them, and that through education they will learn other good qualities.
For example: a confident man is attractive in the eyes of a woman.
At the survival level, a confident man will have more leadership skills and more ability to achieve his goals, not being discouraged at the first adversity.
This will promote the survival of the woman and the survival of the offspring.
At the level of reproduction, a secure man will pass certain genes to his offspring, but more importantly, he will consciously or unconsciously teach them to have these characteristics, and this in turn will favor their survival.
Remember that when dealing with these concepts we have to jump back into the past, all the way back to primitive times.
The reproductive part of our brain has remained unchanged since then, so we still get attracted to features that are not that important nowadays.
For example, a woman is attracted to a man who has the ability to protect her, but in the Western world there are no ferocious animals!
Protection is mostly provided by institutions...
but her "reproductive side" doesn't know that.
But do women and men feel attraction equally?
IS FEMALE ATTRACTION THE SAME AS MALE ATTRACTION?
No!
Normally they feel attraction for different reasons,then there are exceptions.
Usually:
A man feels attraction, especially in the beginning, by certain physical characteristics, then of course by psychological ones as well.
For a man, physical attraction is sufficient condition to sleep with a woman.
A woman,on the other hand, feels attracted mainly (but not only) by behavioral characteristics.
For a woman, physical attraction is not a sufficient condition for sleeping with a man.
Warning: feeling physical attraction is necessary but it does not mean being attracted to beauty, especially for a woman.
A woman is attracted physically to a man mainly because of his sub-communication,I talked already deeply on these topics in other articles.
Beauty matters until a certain point, when I am asked if beauty is important I often say,
"Do you think that a woman chooses you based on certain survival and reproductive characteristics, beauty certainly can help but don't you think that to ensure survival and reproduction the really important characteristics are others?"
Yes,the important characteristics are others!
And I make another point:
more than being beautiful it is important to give an image of health and hygiene.
Having said that, let us point out a few aspects.
First: be careful not to get confused.
Now I am talking about attraction, which is a phase of the seduction, it is obvious that in a relationship much more is needed.
In other words, it is the necessary but not sufficient condition for seduction.
Attraction is a feeling that if not supported by rapport is very likely to fade away.
Secondly: cultural patterns influence the characteristics that are considered attractive.
Just think of all the changes in the way of dressing and making up that there have been over the centuries, or not to go too far back in time, the predilection, so strong in our days, for very thin women,a thing incomprehensible in other times,where being in the flesh was a sign of health.
Why do cultural patterns influence?
Because man is a social animal, and if a person respects the standards of a particular social group he will have a better chance of being accepted,and perhaps of having a leading position.
Indeed, in our times, models are paid well and have socially elevated positions.
Thirdly : psychological and genetic variations must be kept in mind.
We are not all attracted to the same things, which is why a distinction must be made between traits that generally generate attraction (beauty for women and dominance for men) and traits that generate attraction only in certain people.
For example, a woman may prefer a man who has a specific comportment in a certain situation.
Since situations are infinite, these characteristics will also be infinite.
Not knowing these characteristics beforehand (we don't have telepathy), when we go to seduce a woman we focus on those general characteristics that attract the most women.
For example:
- confidence
- dominance
- positivity
- charisma
- social intelligence
etc. etc.
Then, as we get to know her, we can also show those characteristics to which she is most sensitive, as long as they do not conflict with ourselves.
That's all for today!
Steve