Marriage is a big commitment, so it's essential to choose your partner carefully. You need to ensure you are compatible with each other and share the same values.
How do you ensure that?
Short answer: Taaruf.
Long taaruf: An effective taaruf.
Taaruf is an Arabic word that means “knowing each other”. So if you are already in the process of getting to know each other, then you are in taaruf - plain and simple.
But not all taarufs are created equal, some are more effective than others. Problem is, we are not taught how to properly do taaruf in school or (unfortunately) at home.
So where do we learn? Usually through the media we consume.
The risk with using media is that it is a hit-or-miss proposition. If you can cleverly find good resources, you may get a good education in how to do taaruf. More often than not, this is not the case.
What we learn from the internet, novels, movies, and TV shows is not pointing us toward the kind of taaruf that is in line with our principles. But since that is the only education we see available in front of us, we can’t help but to refer to them when we are going on the journey ourselves.
This is why I do what I do; to make this education simple and accessible for all.
Taaruf, when done well, can help you figure out who is the best candidate for you. By asking the right questions and knowing how to get honest answers, you can spend the least amount of time to know a person well enough to make the initial decision - to commit, or not to commit.
Choosing your partner wisely, it goes beyond choosing a partner for yourself. We also think about choosing a future parent for our future children. Whether or not we end up becoming a parent is irrelevant because the key here is to find and nurture those qualities in ourselves and in our partner.
There are 3 keys to effective taaruf:
- Know what you want, clearly.
- Know how to find the person you want, strategically.
- Know who can help you in the process, wisely.
I’ll explain more soon.
That’s it for today.
See you tomorrow!
Whenever you are ready, there are 2 ways I can help you:
- Kelas Menuju Sedia - ini untuk persediaan diri agar cukup bersedia untuk commit ke arah perkahwinan.
- Kelas Mencari Jodoh - ini untuk memahami proses untuk mencari dan menentukan sama ada calon anda itu sesuai atau tidak.
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