Hey Beloved,
I want to take a moment to talk with you—yes, you—about something God has really laid on my heart: forgiveness.
This isn’t just a lesson I’m sharing; this is something God is continually teaching me. I know how hard it can be to forgive when you’ve been deeply hurt, misunderstood, or betrayed. But I also know the freedom that forgiveness brings. And I believe with all my heart that God wants you to be free.
Let me share with you what I’ve learned and experienced, along with five powerful truths that may help guide you if you’re struggling to forgive.
1. Unforgiveness Is Rooted in Pride
God showed me something that completely changed my perspective: unforgiveness is a form of pride. It’s when we hold on to hurt and refuse to let go, thinking our way is better than God’s. Scripture reminds us that all sin falls into one of three categories: the lust of the flesh, the lust of the eyes, and the pride of life.
Unforgiveness fits right into that last one.
When we say, “They hurt me, and I will never forgive them,” we elevate our pain and judgment above God's command. But beloved, pride always leads to a fall. Humility, on the other hand, leads to healing.
2. Forgiveness Is a Command, Not a Suggestion
Ephesians 4:32 tells us, “Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you.” God doesn’t ask us to forgive just when it’s easy—He commands us to forgive as many times as necessary. Not because He wants to burden us, but because He knows what’s best for us.
In Matthew 18, Peter asked Jesus how many times he should forgive—seven? Jesus replied, “Not seven times, but seventy-seven times.” Forgiveness is a lifestyle, not a one-time act.
3. Sometimes We Don’t Even Realize We’re Holding Onto Unforgiveness
This one hit me personally. I was at a revival, praying, feeling like I was in a good place. But when I asked God to search my heart, I heard Him say, “You need to forgive.” I was stunned. I didn’t even know I was holding onto anything. But God revealed it—and confirmed it through someone else that very night.
You see, we can’t trust our own hearts. Jeremiah 17 says, “The heart is deceitful above all things and desperately wicked—who can know it?” That’s why we need the Holy Spirit to reveal hidden places where unforgiveness still lingers.
4. Forgiveness Isn’t About Excusing the Wrong
Let me be clear: forgiving someone doesn’t mean what they did was okay. It doesn’t justify their actions. It doesn’t minimize your pain. But forgiveness is saying, “God, I trust You more than I trust my own need for justice.”
When Jesus went to the cross, He didn’t deserve that suffering. He even asked the Father to take the cup from Him. But then He said the words that we must learn to say: “Not my will, but Yours be done.”
Forgiveness is surrender. It’s choosing God’s will over our own.
5. Forgiveness Leads to Freedom and Healing
The enemy wants to keep us in bondage. He’ll feed our anger, our memories, our pain—because he knows that unforgiveness is a trap. But God’s will is freedom. The moment we release that offense, healing can begin.
Maybe you’re in one of two places:
- You know you need to forgive, but it’s hard.
- You don’t even realize you’re holding something—but if the Holy Spirit reveals it, you need to act.
Either way, God wants to set you free. And He’s not leaving you to figure it out alone. His Spirit will guide you, comfort you, and give you the strength to do what feels impossible.
Final Encouragement
I’ve been prideful before. I’ve wrestled with unforgiveness. But I’ve also seen how God restores, heals, and blesses when we choose obedience over pain.
Let God search your heart. Let Him cleanse you. He’s not out to hurt you—He’s out to heal you. There is so much joy, so much freedom, waiting for you on the other side of forgiveness.
I’m praying for you, Beloved. May the Lord give you strength. May His love fill every broken place. And may your heart be free—truly free—in Jesus’ name.
Forgive. Forgive. Forgive.
Let’s keep growing deeper roots in Christ together.
With love and encouragement,
Lashondra
Spiritual Growth Matters, Let's GROW!
