If you're like a lot of people, you're juggling a demanding job, family responsibilities, and everything in between, and chances are you've felt the burden of impending burnout at some point. Burnout isn't just a feeling of tiredness - it's a deeper, heavier, more persistent exhaustion that impacts every area of your life. It's a nagging feeling and can be a real pain in the @$$. The good news? Recognition is the first step in prevention. And by taking intentional steps early on, you can recover and reclaim your energy. Kick it in the @$$ before it kicks you!
What Is Burnout, Really?
Burnout is a state of chronic stress that leads to emotional exhaustion, detachment, and reduced performance. It's more than just a bad day or a feeling of overwhelm. It's a gradual process that can sneak up on you if you're too consumed with the hustle and grind to pay attention. It's like a toddler who's trying to show you that new thing he can do. He'll follow you around and yell at you until you stop to look at him! (Parents, you know what I'm talking about)
Signs You Might Be Burning Out
Since we often wear many hats, burnout can look different for everyone. Burnout also falls within a spectrum, and can be dependent on a person's stress window threshold. And, it won't affect two people exactly the same. We're all unique after all. But here are some common signs to watch out for:
- Constant fatigue: no matter how much sleep or rest you get, you can't shake this sleepiness and lethargy. You may try to rest, but still feel tired. My kids are teens now, so I haven't been in the newborn sleepless nights stage for a while, but that! That's what it can feel like.
- Irritability and mood swings: you've tried a little snacky snack, so you're not hangry. You've tried resting. But the slightest little thing can trigger frustration or impatience. If you notice people starting to avoid you because you're being a grump, it might be a sign that you're burning out.
- Feeling detached: you might feel disconnected from your work, family, or even yourself. You've taken disassociation to new levels and may have even depersonalized. You could be experiencing some depression or anxiety, and you no longer enjoy the things you once did. You're listless and apathetic.
- Decreased productivity: are you finding that it takes you twice as long to do a task as it used to? Or you might even procrastinate completely and struggle to even start. Just the thought of work could be debilitating for you and stop you in your tracks. Tasks that used to be manageable may now feel overwhelming or pointless.
- Physical symptoms: our bodies are incredible at telling us how our minds are feeling before we even notice. We can store trauma in our bodies and it may become trapped. Those 'butterflies' in your stomach, or the lump in your throat are your body's way of telling you that something's up. You may be experiencing more headaches, stomach issues, or sleep disturbances than usual without a clear cause.
- Loss of motivation: your productivity has dropped because you no longer see the point in doing anything. Things that once excited you feel like chores. It feels like it's taking all of your energy just to exist, let alone work or take care of yourself and your family.
If you're checking a few of these off the list, it's time to take a pause and listen to your body. I've found in my experience that if I don't slow down when I start to notice these signs, life has a way of making me slow down! Sometimes with illness, an injury, or even a job loss! The Universe will teach you with a metaphor and if you don't listen, it'll hit you with a 2x4.
Strategies to Help You Recover From Burnout
You can't just ignore burnout or tell it to piss off and go away. And burnout doesn't care if you're too busy for it or to slow down. It'll getcha! It needs care, boundaries, and sometimes professional support.
I teach busy individuals how to prevent burnout, reduce the symptoms, and reclaim their energy. Here are some strategies I use with my clients:
- Prioritize rest and sleep: It sounds obvious, but in the hustle, rest is often the first thing sacrificed. I get it! This is easier said than done (I even posted a reel about how garbage this advice can be. But stick with me...). This advice probably came from some privileged, rich, old guy who is so out of touch with life but read about burnout in some book or medical journal. Slowing down and resting may not be a luxury you have! But listen up, you don't have to bed rot for an entire day or head out to some weekend retreat. Just do your best to find a way to get at least 7-8 hours of sleep. (Talk to your doctor if you need help sleeping). And take even 5 minutes to just place your hand on your chest... and breathe. Feel the heart beating in your chest. Bring your awareness back into your body and out of your monkey chatter mind... then go on with the shitshow that is your life right now.
- Set boundaries like a boss: I'll tell you right now, you had better get good at saying this one word - 'no'! It's a full sentence. You do not need to explain yourself or justify. Just say 'no'. (My Millenial peeps, remember DARE?) Learn to say no - without guilt. Whether it’s extra work hours or social obligations, protecting your time is key to managing stress. Protect your peace and stop taking on more than you need to so you can try to please people. Take care of you
- Move your body (even a little): This can be challenging, especially when you're already exhausted. You get energy from exercising... but you need the energy to exercise! Ain't that a kick in the pants?! But tell yourself that you want to move, even just for 5 minutes. Go for a walk, or do some light stretching. You'll probably find that getting started is the hardest part and after those 5 minutes, you've hit your groove and you want to keep going. And if not, that's cool, too!
- Connect with your support system: Reach out to friends, family, or a counselor. Talking about how you feel can lighten the load and give you new perspectives. Research has shown that people with support systems, friends, or community report higher perceived happiness than those who do not. We are social creatures by nature! We need human interaction. I didn't have a support system for a very long time and I was flying solo, so I know how difficult it can be! But now you have me, so no excuses!
- Practice mindfulness and self-compassion: I am/was the queen of unrealistic expectations. I demand the best out of myself (and others), and it can be exhausting trying to live up to an unreasonable standard. So chill the F out! Try meditation, deep breathing, or simply check in with yourself throughout the day. Be kind to yourself — burnout is not a personal failure. It is okay to not be okay. Acknowledge what's happening, accept that life can be sh!t sometimes, and then let yourself feel all of the things! Work your way through all of it, with compassion. You don't have to be Superman/Wonder Woman all the damn time!
- Reassess your priorities: I saved the best for last! This was a gamechanger in my healing journey! I was trying to be everything for everyone all. the. time. And it's bullshit. It is not possible - even for badasses like us. So figure out what's important to you, what your core values are, what you need to feel fulfilled and of value, and let those be your guiding principles. The rest is just extra. ChatGPT is really good at (compassionately) calling you on your shit. I will tell it all of the things that I want to accomplish, and instead of laughing at me, it will tell me that I'm ambitious and a real go-getter, then tell me a realistic plan according to my priorities. (Give it a try! Ask ChatGPT to plan your day or your week for you)
Burnout is tough - it can be a real b!tch - but it’s not permanent. Taking small, intentional steps to care for yourself can make a huge difference. It doesn't have to be bubble baths, spa days, or bedrotting with a tub of ice cream. If you’re feeling overwhelmed, remember you’re not alone — and help is always available.
Want more tips on managing burnout and thriving as a busy professional or parent? Follow @activwellnessburnoutcounsellor for support, tools, and encouragement every step of the way. Or head over to my Coaching page and apply to work 1:1! I'll give you a no bullshit approach to health and preventing burnout.
With love,
Amanda
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