The Rule Obsession: Finding Balance Between Order and Common Sense

In today's society, there's a palpable shift towards stringent adherence to rules, a stark contrast to earlier, more relaxed times. Reflecting on this, I recall the days when restaurants had smoking sections, subtly acknowledging that smoke doesn't respect boundaries, yet people coped without much fuss. 

Fast forward to the present, and the scenario is drastically different. Consider a mother in a park, spotting a man smoking a hundred yards away—not directly affecting anyone—and yet, her reaction might be one of disproportionate alarm. “You can’t do that here!!!! Rheeeeeee!!!!!”

This isn't just about smoking; it's a symptom of a broader societal trend where there's an overwhelming focus on rules, often at the expense of pragmatism and personal judgment.  

This growing obsession with rules often overlooks practicality. For example, the same mother worried about distant smoke might routinely feed her children less-than-healthy fast food and pop tarts for breakfast. Here lies the irony: the selective enforcement and fear-driven adherence to rules can sometimes lead to inconsistencies that undermine the very purpose of those rules. This scenario raises questions about what truly constitutes a risk and whether our responses are proportionate to the actual danger.

My perspective on rules has evolved over the years. Initially a rule follower, I've grown to appreciate rules that are logical and enhance societal functioning. However, I've come to value even more the unspoken agreement among people to simply not act dumb—thus obviating the need for many explicit rules. 

This realization hit home during a visit to Notre Dame University amid the easing phases of the COVID-19 pandemic. As I approached the gym without a mask—mindfully distant from others—a young fit female employee dramatically gestured to her mask in a panic, almost slapping her face. She looked ridiculous. This encounter was less about the risk of disease transmission and more about a rigid adherence to rules without room for situational awareness.  

My wife had a similar experience at a local college town coffeeshop. She peeked in the window of the shop, saw a bunch of maskless visitors sipping their drinks at tables. So, she walked in to order only to be scolded by the barista. “MASK!” You see, we were unaware that you couldn’t spread COVID while sitting down, so that’s our bad. But the rude overreaction was insane.  

Instances like these illustrate a disconnect between rule enforcement and real-world contexts, highlighting a tendency to cling to rules as a sort of psychological safety net rather than a practical guideline. This overemphasis on rules can lead to a robotic kind of social interaction, where people respond more to the letter of the law than to its spirit.  

What we might instead strive for is a culture where common sense prevails and where rules serve as guides rather than dictates. It is essential to balance safety and practicality, ensuring that while we protect ourselves and others, we also maintain a level of flexibility that allows for human judgment. Encouraging a mindset that values reason over blind rule-following can lead to more meaningful interactions and a more harmonious coexistence.

Ultimately, the goal should be to foster a society where individuals are thoughtful and considerate, not merely because rules demand it, but because they recognize the value of such behavior in themselves and others. If you see someone breaking a rule that affects no one, you don’t have to be a Karen.  

You can just go about living your life and mind your own business.