I have another writing competition coming up. This one is all new to me. I believe I’ll have five days after I’m told the topic and word count to write and submit my entry. It’s judged by other authors who enter under a different genre. So, not my competitors. I’ll be reading two stories and voting for which of the two I think should move on. Then two more, and two more. A total of six in the first round. So, each pair is a mini battle. As they get narrowed down, I’ll be asked to read a few more pairs and rating them one vs the other. This battle style will continue until there’s a winner in each genre. I believe the judges will then pick an overall winner. I’ve never done anything like this before so I’m excited to try it. I'll let you know how it goes and if I win or lose and in which round. Wish me luck!
I’ve finished writing the story I'm submitting for the romance anthology. I asked my editor to take a quick look at it. She was happy to do so, but somewhere in our communication, she didn’t catch that it’s a romance. So far, when I write romance, it’s spicy. The romance books I read are spicy, so it’s how I write them. My editor, like my best friend, doesn’t usually read this genre. I know, I should have an editor who specializes in my genre. The thing is, I know my editor and we work really well together. I don’t want to find a different one. I’m happy to have active discussions about why I’ve written certain scenes the way I chose to write them. It works well for me.
For this particular story, one of the requirements besides romance, is that the main character is a senior citizen, aged sixty-five or older. If the senior character isn’t the main character, then the main character must do some type of kindness for the senior character. I believe my story meets the criteria.
Back to the miscommunication, my editor didn’t realize it was a romance. When she began editing, she thought I lost my mind. I wrote it with a fast falling in love trope, known as insta-love. This doesn’t necessarily mean love at first sight, but faster than what usually happens in real life. (Though my husband swears he felt love at first sight when we met.)
My editor began editing from a place of- this man is taking advantage of this girl, he’s practically a predator. She was ready to kill him off because of the thoughts in his head about his love interest. Once we talked and I explained it’s a romance, she told me to ignore her comments. The reason I bring this up is because of the younger generation's mindset about love and romance. I often find that younger women, (below forty) either have a view that men are out to hurt them or take advantage in some way. Or to the other extreme they want the men they date to strangle them during sex, because the books and movies they’re exposed to make this activity the norm. My editor volunteers with kids in foster care. She’s seen a lot of abuse. A couple of her friends are going through messy divorces and they’re currently hating on men as a result and venting to my editor. Her mind was leaning towards the man hating side while she was reading this story.
I’m twenty years her senior and we sometimes need to have a long discussion about my opinion vs hers. A very long time ago, I read a book called, Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus. I highly recommend it by the way. This book combined with my own experiences has taught me that men tend express their love in a much more physical way. Women express their love in a more nurturing way. Each sex can certainly lean towards their opposite M.O. on occasion. But generally, men are physically attracted to someone first, and express their love with physical intimacy. Women are often attracted to characteristics like is he a good protector? Provider? Does he stimulate my brain? My heart? Because I’m attracted to him, I’m going to nurture him by feeding him, cleaning our space, or being kind to his family. Men are often thinking, I want to protect her and make her feel good with lots of orgasms. Men, am I wrong?
I tell you all of this because I think about the differences in my generation and hers often. I’m sad when women are suspicious of men and their motives. I’m sad when they think being choked is the hottest thing in bed. I struggle with these differences from my own feelings about men. I don’t want to change men into sensitive creatures who are afraid to speak their true feelings. I appreciate the senses they have naturally. I also don’t want young men or women to think abuse is love. I asked in a previous blog if anyone has checked if the amount of accidental strangulation deaths has increased in the past decade. I will venture to say it has increased.
I just watched a cooking competition where the winner was memorialized at the end of the program. The girl was in her early twenties, with a bright future ahead of her, it was tragic. There’s a lot of speculation around her death, it’s officially been ruled a suicide, according to online sources. But she was in an abusive relationship with a guy who was always strangling her. Some of her friends believe she was accidentally or possibly purposely strangled. Was she a victim of what I’m talking about here? Who knows? But if she was, what a terrible waste of a lovely, talented, young woman.
I’m not sure what the answers are, but for me, I won’t be writing about strangulation as a fun time during sex. If that’s your kink, go for it, but please be very careful! As far as my editor goes, I think we'll continue to have long discussions about my stories and I’m okay with that.
Switching gears, I'd like to talk about reviews. There seems to be a few common styles of reviews and I want to categorize them here.
1. The spoiler. This is a review that can be positive or negative, where the reviewer carelessly incorporates the biggest surprises in your book and spoils the big reveal or the twist at the end for other possible readers. Many platforms now offer a check box if the review contains spoilers, so it doesn’t just pop-up and warns potential readers about the spoilers.
2. The lonely star rating without any review. This one is self-explanatory.
3. The fake review, by a person who obviously didn’t read your book. This one usually just reworks the summary or blurb from the back of the book. Sometimes they even invent things that never happened in your story, because they have no idea what happened.
4. The one liner. This one usually says something about how great the book is but doesn’t mention anything from the story at all. Something like: Loved it!
5. The full review by a person who obviously read your book. This is the ultimate review authors dream about seeing on their book sale page. This type of review will often contain quotes from the book, and they’re more often positive than negative. The reviewer elaborates about the characters they loved and why, without spoilers. The reviewer may comment about the knowledge the author displayed about a location or profession, they may talk about the realism or the amazing descriptions of fantastical creatures.
If you read a book that you absolutely love, then write a great review. Tell other readers why you loved it. Give your favorite books and authors a number five! Honestly, all of the review types 1-4 are not helpful for an author. Even if you give them five stars, if you only give a star rating and say nothing, potential readers will disregard your rating.
If you loved a particular book, or even just liked it a lot, pretend you want a friend to read it. What would you tell your friend to get them to read the book? You wouldn’t want to ruin the mysteries, so you wouldn’t say anything to spoil those for your friend, right? You would describe your favorite characters, you would tell them about something funny that happens or maybe about a funny characteristic they have, like a love of practical jokes.
If you want to help an author, be more successful because you love their writing, share their book. You can literally post a link to purchase the book on your social media or you can tell everyone by posting a review on Amazon, Goodreads, or wherever it’s sold, announcing to anyone who happens along why they need to read this book.
As a reader, turned reviewer, you have the power in your hands make or break to your favorite author's success. Indie authors in particular need these reviews. They don’t have huge marketing budgets to get the word out about their books. There are wonderful stories, sitting in the dark, just waiting for someone like you to shine a light on them, to get readers to notice them. Be the light! Share a book, leave a great review, not just five stars, but a quality NUMBER FIVE!
As always, thanks so much for reading.