To write romance or not to write romance, that is my question. Okay, forget about the Shakespeare, I’m a romance author it’s what I do. It’s very difficult to write a story without any romance in it but I’m also a horror writer and romance doesn’t necessarily have a place in horror stories, but it doesn’t not have a place either (please forgive my double negative). I’ve been debating if I should add some romance to my horror story. My work in progress is called VioleNt. It’s definitely a horror story and a bit of a thriller, maybe a psychological thriller. But my main character, the female badass, has met a couple of cousins who are very hot and very cool.
They’re her new friends, she likes them a lot. Does she like them enough to date them? Should I add romance to my horror story? It’s very difficult to make this choice, I think once I’m well again, and I’m able to think about it, and write again, maybe she’ll tell me what she wants to do. Then I won’t have to make that decision, she’ll make it for herself, but if she does decide to date, she’s going to date both of those cousins and it’s gonna be a polyamorous relationship or in the romance world what’s known as a reverse harem. Remember, my acronyms from two weeks ago? That means it’s a(n) RH, for those of you who were paying attention.
Yes I’m still struggling with this health situation. I’m really sick of being sick, it’s been a month already, come on! April is typically a difficult month for me, the anniversary of my father’s death is on the 10th. This year will be fourteen years since we lost him. I have tons of wonderful memories. I was a serious Daddy’s Girl growing up. When he mowed the lawn, I followed with my toy mower. When he got sweaty and took off his shirt, I did the same. Yes I’m a girl, but I was like three or four and nobody cared. He took me hiking, camping, boating, fishing, shooting, and horseback riding. He rode all the rollercoasters I wanted to ride even though they gave him a headache and cheered at all my sports games and dance recitals. He gave my music a chance and actually liked the Eagles and Lynyrd Skynyrd. He even took me to Rocky Horror Picture Show at midnight when I was like 15. (Google it if you’re not familiar) He supported all of my dreams and silly ideas.
It wasn’t always a bed of roses though. My dad was an alcoholic. He wasn’t a mean drunk, he was funny and talked too much. But he and my mother couldn’t make it work and they got divorced when I was about fourteen. He became a much worse alcoholic, still not violent, but completely irresponsible. He got sober while I was still in high school, he stayed sober for the final Tweny-eight years of his life. I posted a story about it in a previous blog.
Later in life when he and his second wife had problems, he came to live with my family. My husband is a saint! But that's a story for another day. While he lived with us, we got to be friends. Being friends with your parents as an adult is very enlightening. You come to realize they’re just people. They are humans who make mistakes and when you’re a kid you think of them as super heroes, but they are just trying to do their best. It was easy to forgive my dad for his mistakes. He was a wonderful person who always tried his best. He never met a stranger and went out of his way to help everyone he met. It’s a value I’m glad he instilled in me. I’ve done my best to teach my kids to be kind, accepting, helpful, and loyal like my father taught me. During the fourteen years he lived with us, we got very close. My son and husband developed close relationships with him, and we’re all thankful for the time we had with him.
When he got sick, we thought he had maybe six months left. Thankfully, he somehow managed to survive for more than two years and we did our best to make the most of it. My brother and I took him on a trip to New York and DC, it was a wonderful experience. My niece and son were able to join us and they have great memories of the trip. When he got sick enough for hospice, it was hard to cope with losing him a little each day. He never lost his sense of humor and we dealt with his impending doom with humor as much as possible. When we had to talk about funeral arrangements and what he wanted, he would jokingly refer to himself as “the carcass”. People thought it was morbid, but it’s how we got through the difficult discussions.
He had the best awful dad jokes that often left us in tears. He also had a way of getting himself into the most bizarre situations and then coming up with the most ridiculous solutions. We still laugh about the time he was backing up a trailer with a truck and somehow got it stuck with the hitch up against a tree. His solution was to chop down the tree. Thankfully my husband was able to get it out without any loss of limbs. See, ridiculous dad joke! If you’re lucky enough to still have your parents, talk to them. Ask about their childhood, their family, their work. Be their friend, tell them you love them. You’ll be happy you did it while you could.
My childhood friend who lost her parents fairly young, said something that helped me appreciate every minute. When my father was sick, I had to drive him twenty miles every day for treatments for months, it’s all I did. I would complain about the traffic, or sitting in the hospital while he got chemo, and my friend said, “I used to complain about driving my mom to her treatments too, but now that she’s gone, I would give anything to sit in traffic or a waiting room so I could talk to her again. Appreciate it while you have it.” She was SO right. I would give anything to have one more day with my dad at the hospital or in traffic. She made me realize I needed to appreciate those moments. Because of her I got my dad to write stories from his childhood. We have them now and they’re wonderful. We learned so many new things about him and asked more questions because of what he wtote. Appreciate your loved ones while they’re here. You won’t regret listening or saying I love you, but you’ll regret it if you don’t.
This Monday there’s going to be a total eclipse in part of the US. There’s a large swath across Texas that will reach totality. My son is currently in Houston for work, they’re going to get almost totality. I was thinking about this and it made me remember a book, actually a pair of books I read years ago. Stephen King's Delores Claiborne and Gerald’s Game, both have the same eclipse in them. It’s really interesting how he tied that moment in time together for two complete strangers. I’ve always loved his books, but sometimes he amazed me with the things he’s written. I love when authors come up with ideas like this, as a reader it’s such a thrill, like we’re in on the secret.
Have you ever thought your favorite song is special only to you and significant in your life because of whatever was happening at the time? Then you meet someone who loves that song because of how they connected to it due to the events in their life? It’s weird how we forget that other people can experience the same thing as us and feel it in a completely different way. It’s a sad day when you come to terms with the fact that your song isn’t just yours. It’s like when you see your second grade teacher at the grocery store and you have to face the fact that they aren’t only your teacher, they’re a person with a life outside of the part you experience in the classroom. Just one of the many things to cross my mind while I continue to be a medical experiment and can’t seem to focus enough to write in my work in progress or WIP.
If you haven’t read those two King books, I highly recommend them! You can do an eclipse themed reading in honor of the eclipse. If horror isn’t your thing, I can also highly recommend a darkish romance series, Hannaford Prep, by J Bree. The main character is named Eclipse, she goes by the nickname, Lips, because it’s right in the name. See, clever authors float my boat, (another awful dad saying).
I’m surprised I rambled on so long. I tell you these antibiotics make me extra weird, mostly sleepy and nauseous, but also very weird. Some of my dreams have been.so wild since I’ve been taking them. I’m heading to bed. As always thank you for reading, and don’t forget to check out the eclipse!