With just putting a book out and still wanting to share my work with the world, I decided to blog. The title came to me like ... it was meant to be. So here I am. I'm no English major, so bear with me lol. But today's topic is " Finding my place ". I've loved writing since a young child, till this day I thank my 4th grade teacher Mrs. McDonald for making us do journals. After that, paper and a pen, pencil, marker... whatever I could find became my safe place. And for a long time, I stuck with it, notebooks and notebooks full of emotion, things I didn't know how to put into words. There have been times where I was so overwhelmed and just couldn't seem to think straight and my pen would just take off and I would write till I had absolutely nothing left. I'd feel better and still have my thoughts to me, I feel like I can be hard to understand, so pen over people became a no brainer.
For years, I stopped writing as much. I tried the people instead of the pen, and in some cases it was fine. Other times I felt as if I cheated on the pen and felt instant regret. People now had pieces of me that I couldn't take back, that I no longer had security over, no control. So, the next option was to talk to myself lol, may sound crazy for a while I worked, no pen but no people to store my feelings and use it against me whenever they felt the need to attack. Don't get me wrong, I love a good self-talk. I'm able to process my thoughts and make everything make sense. No one to argue with or try to belittle any of my statements.
Now here I am, realizing by not writing and sharing, I've been cheating myself. I've always felt writing was my gift, that and the ability to find a good movie. Why wasn't I sharing this with the world? Why was I so afraid to showcase my passion? I just answered the question, fear. I was afraid of coming up short, not being everyone's cup of tea without remembering some people prefer water with lemon, and that's okay. With it being a new year and losing people in this world that is around my age, I've decided to stop being afraid. To finally let people in, to finally find my place and write till I simply can't anymore. There will be more books as long as I'm inspired.
I hope you stay along for the ride. It will definitely be a rollercoaster.