Dear Member,
If you're a foreigner looking to date in the Philippines, it's easy to get caught up in the excitement of finding love in a place known for its warm culture, tropical beauty, and friendly women. But while Filipinas can make amazing girlfriends or wives, a lot of foreign men shoot themselves in the foot—repeatedly—by making mistakes that are entirely avoidable.
Here are seven of the dumbest (but common) mistakes foreigners make when they get a Filipina girlfriend—and how to avoid them.
1. Thinking You’re in a Disney Movie
It might feel like a fairytale at first—especially if you're older, divorced, or have struggled to connect with women in the West. Suddenly, you're getting attention from a younger, attractive woman who seems genuinely interested in you. That's usually the opposite to Western women who are probably ignoring you or look at you with disdain because you are not a millionaire or ''alpha'' male.
But don’t let fantasy blind you. Many foreigners dive in headfirst without taking the time to understand the culture, the woman's intentions, or the reality of dating in the Philippines. This mindset leads to poor decisions—like proposing too early or moving her into your place within days.
Solution: Keep your head on straight. Move slowly. Ask questions. Take time to learn about her background, values, and goals.
2. Sending Money Online Without Having Met Her
This is the #1 trap. Many Filipinas live in poverty or financially challenging situations. It’s not uncommon for them to ask for “help,” especially if they see you're generous. Unfortunately, some are skilled manipulators who know how to push emotional buttons and lie through their teeth.
Solution: Never send money to someone you haven’t met in person. And even after meeting, be cautious. A little help here and there is fine once you’re in a committed relationship, but don’t become her ATM.
3. Ignoring Red Flags
If she’s constantly on her phone, won’t let you meet her family, avoids deep conversations, or seems more interested in what you can give than who you are—those are red flags. Some men ignore them because they’re desperate for affection or afraid to lose her.
Solution: Trust your gut. If something feels off, it probably is. Ask yourself: If this relationship were happening in your home country, would you tolerate this behavior? Also, read my ebook ''How To Meet Filipinas'' as I have a chapter on red flags and also green flags of a good Filipina. This comes with the membership package here https://payhip.com/b/04Nym
4. Not Understanding the Family Dynamic
In the Philippines, family is everything. When you date a Filipina, you’re often dating into her family, too. That can mean financial expectations, frequent visits, or pressure to support others in her circle.
Solution: Have a clear conversation early on about what your role will be with her family. Be respectful, but set healthy boundaries. You're not obligated to support everyone with your foreign income.
5. Trying to “Save” Her
A lot of foreigners fall into the savior complex—thinking they’re rescuing a damsel in distress from a hard life. While intentions might be noble, this mindset creates an imbalance and often leads to resentment on both sides.
Solution: Aim for partnership, not charity and being a ''white knight''. Support her dreams and help her grow, but don’t try to control or “fix” her life. Empowerment is better than rescue.
6. Assuming She’s Like Western Women (or the Opposite)
Some men assume Filipinas are like Western women and get confused when cultural behaviors don’t match. Others swing too far the other way, thinking all Filipinas are submissive, traditional, or "easy to control."
Solution: See her as an individual. Yes, cultural values play a role—Filipinas often value loyalty, family, and religion—but don’t lump them all into one box. Get to know her as a person, not just a stereotype.
7. Broadcasting the Relationship Online
Too many foreigners love to show off their new Filipina girlfriend on social media—especially if she’s much younger. While you might feel proud, this can invite scammers, trolls, and even jealousy or sabotage.
Worse, some Filipinas use this as a way to boost their own image, gain followers, or attract other men with money.
Solution: Keep your relationship private—especially at the beginning. Let it develop naturally before turning it into a public display. Protect your heart (and wallet) by keeping things low-key.
Final Thoughts
Dating a Filipina can be a wonderful, life-changing experience. Many foreigners go on to have fulfilling marriages and happy lives in the Philippines or they bring their Filipina wife back to their country. But it all starts with awareness.
Avoid these seven dumb mistakes, and you’ll already be ahead of most guys who let their emotions override common sense. Remember—love is a beautiful thing, but it’s even better when mixed with maturity, patience, and a clear understanding of what you’re really getting into.
There are over 9,000 Filipinas in my facebook group ''Philippines Fun Expat & Filipina Hangout'' and although it's not a dating profile group you can chat with them in their private chat if they so choose to let you.
We also have a monthly Manila night out for paid group members in classy places like Antidote Sky Bar. A plethora of Filipina singles come and Julie our beautiful group admin is a great host.
Julie also does a Q & A livestream every Saturday morning Philippines time for paid members and you can ask her any questions whether about investments, budgets, destinations, accommo or dating.
As part of the membership you also get 2 wonderful ebooks sent to you ''How To Meet Filipinas'' and ''Golden Keys To Unlimited Prosperity''
With all these tools you WILL FIND THE FILIPINA OF YOUR DREAMS!
Click this link and take action now to get your membership (or copy n paste to your search bar if link not shareable) https://payhip.com/b/04Nym
Kind Regards,
Jeff Brown
Philippines Fun Expat & Filipina Hangout Admin