Finding Resolve on Unfavorable Land
"Hey, so how am I able to do that?"
crickets
Yup. The age-old response to an individual facing lifestyle segregation.
The lay of the land — the unspoken rules written on invisible parchment — is that you still have to look the part and fit the mold before you’re allowed to benefit from the fruits of opportunity, experience, and engagement.
For the past few years, I’ve been inquiring about moving abroad. I’ve followed travel influencers, commented on their posts, asked real questions — questions that matter to people like me. The kind of questions that don’t fit in neat, aesthetic captions:
“How does someone like me, with no traditional stability, make this happen?”
Most of the time: silence.
Or worse — generic, surface-level responses that clearly weren’t meant to meet me where I stood.
And this isn’t new.
About a year ago, I asked another question:
“How does someone homeless get a mailbox?”
You’d think the answer would be simple. But it wasn’t. It was convoluted, unclear, and tangled in modern red tape. There are conditions in place now that make even receiving mail a gatekept process if you’re not part of the “accepted” system.
The truth is, there’s little help for those of us who’ve fallen outside society’s comfort zone. The support that should be accessible is riddled with hoops, criteria, waiting periods, and judgment.
Most nonprofits and state agencies don’t ask adequate questions. They don’t dig deeper. They just check boxes. And if you don’t check the right ones? You’re left at the door.
Even well-meaning strangers often miss the point. The average person sees the situation and responds with:
“Just get a job.”
But this post isn’t about that.
This post is about how people like me — who want to thrive, explore, and live fully — are held hostage by broken systems and silenced at every turn.
The question remains:
- Where is the actual help for those of us below the societal line?
- Why is dignity conditional?
- Why do we need to prove we’re struggling to get support?
- Why are the basics (like an address) still a reach for those without walls?
The truth is: not everyone has the strength to keep fighting. Many fall into depression, mental anguish, or dormancy because the system wasn't built with them in mind.
But I kept asking. I kept digging. I kept believing there had to be another way.
And here’s the thing: My daughter and I got a mailbox.
Not because the state helped. Not because a nonprofit saved us. But because of our own persistence — and the generosity of our content community.
That’s real. That’s the power of not giving up.
So yes, the dream to live abroad still lives in me. And maybe it won’t happen the traditional way. Maybe I won’t have a perfect plan or a smooth route.
But maybe… just maybe… I can be the words, the resource, the roadmap for someone else like me.
Maybe I’ll help the next person get their mailbox. Maybe I’ll help them get on that plane. Maybe I’ll help them get back to the self they had to abandon to survive.
Because one thing’s for sure:
We’re not meant to live in silence. We’re not meant to wait forever. We’re not meant to be forgotten.
And if no one else will say it? I will.
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