The cosmos doesn’t lie. Right now, with Chiron stationing retrograde, it feels like the wound that never heals has cracked wide open. And this time, it cuts deeper than I ever expected.
This isn’t just an astrology post. It’s personal.
For me, this retrograde—starting in my second house of values and self-worth—has triggered a full-blown excavation of the soul. It’s been relentless. I’ve found myself asking: What is wrong with me? Why have I never been chosen? Why am I still single at 45? Why do I always feel like I don’t belong?
It’s the wound of worth.
Of not feeling seen.
Of never truly being accepted.
And the painful question: Am I inherently unlovable?
The Mirror of the Wounded Healer
Chiron, the wounded healer, doesn’t ask politely. It forces us to confront the dark parts of ourselves—the ones we’ve tried to ignore or hide. And on the Twin Flame path, this mirror is even more intense.
I’ve poured my energy, my heart, my soul into this journey—into healing, into kindness, into love. I've tried to live aligned with my mission, practicing forgiveness, choosing empathy daily, and being of service in a world that often feels cold and indifferent.
But still, I ask why:
Why am I not worthy of abundance?
Why does love seem to elude me?
Why do I keep investing in people who don’t pour back into me?
The Loneliness Behind the Smile
I’ve spent years healing. I’ve forgiven those who hurt me, even when they continued to blame me for their pain. I’ve endured heartbreak and isolation, never fully feeling part of a tribe or a circle of support. I’ve questioned my body image, my personality, and my value in this material-driven world.
I have always been the strong one. The overly self-sufficient one. The one who shows up, even when no one else does.
But behind that strength is a silent ache—a longing to be seen, held, and loved, simply for who I am. Not for what I can do. Not for how much I give. Just me.
The Twin Flame Awakening: A One-Sided Burden?
This Twin Flame journey cracked me open. It awakened something in me, something sacred and raw. And yet, the burden feels like mine alone to carry. My counterpart remains asleep in the same cycles and patterns, while I’ve been doing the deep, painful work to shift and evolve.
I ask myself:
Why am I the only one carrying the weight of this awakening?
Why do I feel like no one ever chooses me?
Why have I always had to be the one to hold it all together?
Breaking the Silence
So today, I’m choosing to break the silence.
I’m done overextending myself for crumbs of validation.
I’m done believing I need to do more or be more to be worthy.
This Chiron retrograde is teaching me something radical: My worth is not up for debate. Not by others, not by society, and especially not by the wounded voices in my own mind.
The walls I’ve built to protect myself are also keeping love out. The loops of self-judgment, shame, and regret only hold me back from creating the life I truly desire. The martyr complex ends here.
Riding the Retrograde Wave
This retrograde is a rollercoaster of emotions, and it’s inviting us—all of us—to feel it all.
Let the grief surface. Let the rage move through you. Let the shame, the guilt, and the self-doubt be seen.
Don’t suppress it. Feel it. Move through it.
Because healing doesn’t come from avoidance; it comes from honest confrontation.
The wound of worth runs deep. It’s ancestral. It’s personal. But we have the power to shift it—if we’re brave enough to face it.
The Invitation: Reclaim Your Power
You are not broken.
You are not unlovable.
You are not invisible.
You are a powerful, radiant soul who deserves to be seen, heard, and valued. Even if no one else has done that for you yet—you can do it for yourself now.
This Chiron retrograde is your invitation to reclaim your power, your self-worth, and your ability to create abundance—not just material, but emotional and spiritual richness.
Let go of the guilt. The shame. The self-blame.
Let go of the outdated beliefs that keep you in cycles of lack and martyrdom.
Let it all go—to open to the new.
Final Reflection
This is not an easy road. This kind of healing—healing out loud—is not for the faint of heart. But if you’re reading this and resonating, know that you are not alone. We heal together, one truth at a time, one choice at a time.
Let Chiron’s retrograde guide you into the depth of your pain, not to hurt you, but to finally set you free.
Because you are worthy.
You always have been.
Now it’s time to believe it.
~ Laura Jean