Ozempic H*es: My Best Friend Caught Me With Her Brother So I Said He Was Helping Me Count Calories

Anna:

My best friend was supposed to be on this Ozempic glow-up journey with me, not getting her calories burned out between my brother’s sheets.

She said he was helping her track macros.

I said, girl, why is your lipgloss on my guest bed and your orgasm echoing through my walls?

I don’t share food.

I don’t share secrets.

And I damn sure don’t share d*ck with women I’ve cried with over cheap wine and canceled men.

But now?

Now the silence in this house is louder than her moans.

And I’m not sure if I want to fight her… or forgive her.

Either way, something’s getting ripped off…wig, waistline, or morals.

Lyric:

I was just trying to get fine and stay fed.

Ozempic cut my cravings, but Jalen gave me something better:  deep strokes, soft lies, and a reason to skip cardio.

I knew Anna would flip when she found out.

I just didn’t know she’d throw hands and throw it back.

One minute I’m getting rawed into enlightenment.

Next minute, I’m ghosted by my bestie and replaced in the group chat like I was never even in it.

But you can’t burn a bitch that’s already been forged in scandal.

I might’ve crossed a line.

But I never came quietly.

We’re two bad bitches. One shared mistake. And a house full of tension.

This isn’t just about weight loss.

This is about losing our grip, our gag reflex, and maybe — just maybe — our friendship.

We said we’d never let a man come between us.

Then her brother did.

Literally.