Erotic Self Knowledge Essay

They say masturbation invites unwanted spirits.

Yet the story of Mary says she was impregnated by a spirit called “God.”

Who decides which spirits are holy and which ones are sinful?

Or more honestly — was Joseph a grown man who impregnated a 16-year old girl, and instead of holding male power accountable, the story was placed on “faith”?

This theology alone shaped a massive disconnect between women and their relationship with their own bodies.

When pleasure is self-directed, it’s labeled dangerous.

When the body is externally claimed, it’s labeled sacred.

That contradiction isn’t accidental — it’s conditioning.

Naming the Disconnect

When masturbation is framed as dishonor, the consequence isn’t morality — it’s disconnection.

You begin to feel undeserving of your own desire.

Masturbation became associated with “lack of self-control,” obsession, or abuse — and yes, many people do use sexual stimulation compulsively. That part is real. But the conclusion was wrong.

The issue was never pleasure.

The issue was absence of self-authority.

Instead of teaching self-autonomy, awareness, and discipline, women were taught avoidance, shame, and separation from the body.

So now the body signals desire — and the mind interprets it as danger.

That’s not intuition. That’s conditioning.

Women were taught to leave their bodies “good” and “untouched” for a future husband — even if no one exists yet. Not even touching yourself was allowed, because that would mean violating your own body.

That belief alone fractures identity.

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