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No One Told Me This: Maryland's Guide to a Lifetime of IDD Services and Support

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I'm a mother in Montgomery County, Maryland. My daughter was diagnosed with autism at age ten — seven years after I first knew, in my gut, that something was different. Nobody told me what to look for, what to ask for, or what was even possible. I found almost everything the hard way, one phone call and one closed door at a time.

This book is what I wish someone had handed me on day one.

No One Told Me This is a complete, honest, Maryland-specific guide to navigating IDD services from the moment you first notice a delay through a lifetime of adulthood. It's not a government pamphlet. It's not a list of links. It's the real map — written by someone who's lived every chapter of it, verified against current Maryland law and regulation, and built to be used, not just read.

Inside, you'll find real answers to the questions no one volunteers:

  • Why "wait and see" from your pediatrician can cost your child years of intervention
  • The exact, word-for-word scripts for requesting an evaluation, disagreeing with a school, and escalating when nobody's responding
  • The single decision — certificate vs. diploma — that determines whether your child keeps school-based services through age 21, and why schools sometimes discourage families from choosing it
  • How to apply for DDA, DORS, and the Autism Waiver without losing years to confusion about which program does what
  • The critical June 30 deadline that determines whether your child gets smooth transition funding or lands on a waitlist thousands of people long
  • What actually happens to SSI, ABLE accounts, and special needs trusts — including the mistakes that have cost real families real money
  • Guardianship, Power of Attorney, and Supported Decision-Making — and a true story about why having the right documents in place isn't optional
  • Housing, healthcare, transportation, employment, and the everyday logistics nobody prepares you for

This book covers the full arc — diagnosis through lifelong adulthood — because that's the truth of this journey. There is no finish line. There's just a shift in who's doing the work. My hope is that this book means you do that work with a map in hand, instead of finding it one painful step at a time, the way I did.

Your child's path may not look like anyone else's. That's not a lesser life. It's a different one — and it deserves to be planned for on its own terms.

You will get a PDF (307KB) file