Module 3 - Does leaving put me or someone else at risk

The Reflection Journal — Module 3: Could Leaving Put Me or Someone Else at Risk?

Looking honestly at risk, so you can plan around it

For many people, separation is painful without becoming dangerous. But if fear, threats, control or violence have been part of your relationship, leaving doesn’t automatically make them stop, and the time around separation can carry extra risk.

You don’t need to predict everything. You need to look honestly at what you already know, and plan around it.

Module 3 helps you think clearly about risk to you, your children, your pets and the people helping you, without panic and without minimising. It’s written by a survivor whose ex found ways around court orders, and who learned the hard way how information travels.

What’s inside

• Look back before you look forward: why past behaviour tells you more than promises.
• Signs of higher danger: the warning signs specialists take most seriously, in plain language.
• Threats that change the risk: including threats made as “jokes,” and threats of self-harm.
• How information travels: school groups, friends and social media, and the birthday invitation that nearly undid a court order.
• Who can you really trust? How one survivor found the person passing on her secrets, and how to quietly protect yourself.
• Hidden trackers: where they’re often hidden, and what to do if you find one.
• Children and pets: protecting them without frightening them or making them responsible for secrets.
• Protection orders: what they can and can’t do, in any country.
• After you’ve left: repeated contact, “chance” meetings, and what to do if you run into them unexpectedly.
• Free, confidential helplines for the UK, US and Australia, and how to find yours elsewhere.

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