The un-intoxicated high

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I left my hotel in Bangkok at midnight.

A rickshaw driver who wanted me to enjoy. A brothel where I sat with a young girl and just talked. A tailor whose measuring tape made me burst out crying because I saw God in every inch of the cloth. A jail cell where I lived what felt like forty-one years. Hans Zimmer playing in my head while I watched the entire matrix of existence unfold in front of me.

My sister appearing in the middle of a foreign road. An ambulance already waiting.

This was my fourth psychosis episode.

The Un-Intoxicated High is a raw, honest memoir spanning fifteen years of gambling addiction, four psychosis episodes across three countries, ego death, spiritual awakening, and the slow road back to ordinary life.

Written in simple Indian English. Exactly as it was lived.

From a van crash in British Columbia to a Bangkok midnight to the quiet of Bengaluru after the storm. From Shiva to Rama to just — still here.

What you will read:

Fifteen years of addiction and what it was really searching for. The first psychosis episode — alone in Campbell River, convinced he was Shiva, driving a van into a parked Jeep at midnight. The Toronto episode — barefoot at the airport, walking against traffic, becoming the Star Child at sunset in a park. The Bangkok episode — the midnight rickshaw, the tailor's measuring tape, the jail cell, the mansion, the sun. And the quiet after. The suit from the Bangkok tailor arriving in the calm.

"I open my eyes and I am still alive. Fresh and Calm."

📄 Format: PDF 📖 Length: Full memoir — 19 chapters, 4 parts 🌍 Instant worldwide delivery 💰 Price: $9.99 USD

This book is for anyone who has ever been somewhere their mind took them that no one else could follow. You are not alone. Someone else went there too. Someone else came back.