Grandparent Custody Planning Worksheet | Legal Custody of Grandchildren | New Zealand Family Court Preparation | Step-by-Step Custody Planner | Instant Download PDF
"I walked into my first meeting with a lawyer completely unprepared. I had facts in my head, concerns in my heart, and nothing on paper. This worksheet is everything I wish I'd had with me that day — and every day after."
— Recovery Mum Bond
You know something needs to change legally. You know the informal arrangement isn't enough. But the path from 'I need to protect these children' to an actual legal order feels impossibly complicated.
Lawyers are expensive. Time with them is short. You need to arrive organised, with everything documented, your situation clearly assessed, and your evidence gathered. This worksheet gives you the structure to do that — step by step, section by section, before the stakes get higher.
⚠️ IMPORTANT LEGAL NOTICE — THIS IS A PLANNING TOOL, NOT LEGAL ADVICE:
This worksheet helps you organise information and prepare for potential custody proceedings. It is NOT legal advice and does not replace consultation with a qualified family lawyer. For legal assistance in New Zealand, contact Community Law Centres (www.communitylaw.org.nz) or Citizens Advice Bureau (0800 367 222).
📍 THIS WORKSHEET IS WRITTEN FOR NEW ZEALAND GRANDPARENTS. It references the Family Court, Oranga Tamariki, NZ legal processes, and NZ-specific support organisations. Some information will not apply in other jurisdictions.
WHAT YOU'LL GET:
A comprehensive six-section planning worksheet covering everything you need to prepare for custody proceedings:
How To Use This Worksheet
When to use it — when considering formal custody arrangements, before meeting with a lawyer, when gathering evidence for court, as an ongoing custody planning tool, and when preparing for a custody hearing. Clear step-by-step instructions for completing each section, keeping records secure, and updating the worksheet as your situation changes.
Section 1: Situation Assessment
Your current caregiving arrangement — how long children have been in your care, the nature of the current living arrangement, and current legal status (informal arrangement, written agreement, temporary court order, or Oranga Tamariki involvement). Why the children are in your care — covering addiction, incarceration, treatment, mental health crisis, abandonment, child safety concerns, and multiple reasons. Why formal custody is necessary — across four categories: safety and protection, practical needs (medical and school decision authority, accessing services, financial assistance), stability, and protection from conflict.
Section 2: Parent's Situation
Detailed current status assessment for Parent #1 (your adult child) and Parent #2 if applicable — covering active addiction, recovery status, treatment or incarceration, whereabouts, guardianship status, current involvement with children, and their position on your having custody. Parallel assessment for the other parent, including whether they are supportive, seeking custody themselves, or not involved.
Section 3: Children's Information
Individual information pages for up to four children — capturing each child's personal details, current status, needs, and relevant circumstances.
Section 4: Documentation Checklist
Condensed evidence summary across all children. Individual documentation sections for each child. Clear checklist of documentation you have and documentation you still need to obtain — so you know exactly where your evidence gaps are before you meet with a lawyer.
Section 5: Financial Planning
Estimated custody costs. Ongoing financial needs for children in your care. A realistic picture of the financial commitment you're taking on and the support available.
Section 6: Action Plan & Timeline
A structured action plan with timeline — turning your assessment and documentation into concrete next steps with timeframes.
Important Reminders
Key considerations to keep in mind as you work through the process.
New Zealand Resources
Legal support, Family Court information, support organisations, and emergency contacts — with addresses, phone numbers, and website links.
WHO THIS IS FOR:
· Grandparents considering or actively pursuing formal custody of grandchildren
· Anyone preparing for a first meeting with a family lawyer
· Grandmothers gathering evidence and documentation for Family Court proceedings
· Anyone whose informal caregiving arrangement is no longer sufficient or stable
· Grandparents who need legal authority for medical decisions, school enrolment, or financial assistance
· Anyone whose adult child is threatening to remove children or contesting the current arrangement
· Grandparents in New Zealand who need NZ-specific legal preparation guidance in plain language
PART OF THE GRANDMOTHER RESOURCES LIBRARY:
Related resources include:
· Grandmother's Dilemma Toolkit — Protecting grandchildren while supporting adult child recovery
· Grandchildren Safety Assessment — Comprehensive safety evaluation tool
· Grandparent Rights & Responsibilities — New Zealand legal framework guide
· Alliance Building with Your Own Partner — When grandparents see things differently
· Alliance Building with Your Adult Child's Partner — Navigating the most complicated alliance in recovery
INSTANT DOWNLOAD DETAILS:
· Comprehensive six-section planning worksheet — New Zealand specific
· PDF format — designed to be printed and completed by hand, or used digitally
· Covers up to four children with individual documentation sections
· Includes action plan template, financial planning section, and full NZ resources directory
· Download available immediately after purchase
· No physical product will be shipped
· Further resources at familyrecoverymum.com
💜 A QUICK NOTE: This is a digital download. We're not able to offer refunds on digital products. Personal use only — may not be shared, resold, or used commercially. Full terms and policies are available in our Shop Policies.
Thank you for trusting Recovery Mum with your family's healing journey.
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