It's been 30 years. I think we've spent enough time together!
Dear Diabetes,
Well, where do I even begin?
We've been together for almost 30 years. That's a long time. Longer than some marriages, longer than most friendships, and definitely longer than I ever planned on sharing my life with anyone!
And let me tell you, you have been one demanding houseguest.
You arrive uninvited, never seem to know when to leave, interrupt my sleep, interfere with my plans and somehow manage to turn the simplest things into a mathematical exercise.
Going out for lunch? Let's calculate.
Going to bed? Let's check.
Feeling a little strange? Let's investigate.
Wanting to enjoy a piece of cake? Well, apparently, there's a meeting about that first!
Honestly, Diabetes, don't you ever take a day off?
Over the years, you've introduced me to highs, lows, needles, insulin, blood glucose meters, alarms, endless calculations and enough medical terminology to qualify for another degree.
You've also given me moments when I've felt frustrated, exhausted and completely fed up.
And yes, there have been days when I've wanted to throw my hands in the air and say, "I've had enough!"
But here's something you need to understand.
You may be part of my life, but you are not my entire life.
You don't get to decide whether I laugh, travel, celebrate, fall in love, enjoy a meal, spend time with family or make plans for tomorrow.
You don't get to take away my personality, my dreams, my sense of humour or my stubborn determination to keep going.
I have learned to live with you, work around you, understand you and sometimes negotiate with you.
Although, let's be honest, you're not always the easiest one to negotiate with!
I have learned that some days will be better than others. Some days my numbers will behave, and other days they will apparently have their own agenda.
But one number does not define my worth, and one difficult day does not mean I've failed.
To anyone else living with diabetes, I want you to remember this:
You are allowed to be frustrated.
You are allowed to have bad days.
You are allowed to laugh about the ridiculous moments.
You are allowed to enjoy your life.
And you are allowed to be proud of how far you've come.
You don't have to be perfect to be doing your best.
So, Diabetes, after almost 30 years, here's where we stand.
We're clearly not breaking up anytime soon, but I am setting a few boundaries.
You can come along for the ride, but you are not driving!
And if you could kindly stop waking me up at inconvenient hours, that would be appreciated.
Yours (occasionally frustrated, but still fabulous),
Schané Jacobs
Author of My Bitter Sweet Struggle
Until next time, keep fighting, keep living, and remember: diabetes is part of your story, but it does not have to be the whole story.
Author of My Bitter Sweet Struggle
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This blog shares personal experiences and is not a substitute for individual medical advice. Always follow your own diabetes care plan and speak to your healthcare team about treatment decisions.