Discovering Authenticity while Cultivating Sustainable Spaces: An Interview with Tyler
This month, let’s explore the theme of self-discovery through the eyes of Tyler (name changed to protect privacy), a 35-year-old garden expert and passionate advocate for sustainability. Tyler’s journey from a small-town upbringing to fully embracing his authentic self offers profound insights into the process of self-discovery and the creation of spaces that reflect our true selves.
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Wyllow Franklin (WF): Hi Tyler! It’s great to chat with you. To start, could you share a bit about your background and what drew you to gardening?
Tyler (T): Hi Wyllow, it’s wonderful to connect! I grew up in a small town where I always felt somewhat different from those around me. From a young age, nature was a refuge for me. I started gardening as a way to connect with the natural world and express myself creatively. Working at a native plant nursery allows me to blend my artistic vision with my passion for sustainability. I enjoy creating gardens that are not only beautiful but also beneficial for the environment, using low-water plants and composting, and designing spaces that attract local wildlife like birds and butterflies.
WF: Your journey is quite remarkable. Can you tell us more about how you began to uncover your true self, especially given your conservative upbringing?
T: Certainly. Growing up in a conservative Christian environment, I struggled with accepting my sexuality. I was taught that being different was something to be ashamed of, which made it hard to confront my own identity. It wasn’t until my mid-twenties, when I started working with a Life Guide, that I began to face these fears. The process involved a lot of introspection and challenging long-held beliefs. It was a journey of peeling back layers to discover who I really am beneath all the expectations and fears.
WF: That sounds like a deep and challenging process. What were some specific moments or experiences that stood out to you during this period of self-discovery?
T: One of the most pivotal moments was when I started to explore my own values and passions openly. I remember a particular day when I was working in the garden and had a breakthrough about how much my creativity and connection to nature meant to me. This realisation helped me understand that my identity wasn’t something to hide but something to embrace and celebrate. Another significant experience was learning to set boundaries with people who didn’t support my true self. It was difficult, but it allowed me to create space for genuine connections and supportive relationships.
WF: Setting boundaries can indeed be challenging. How did you go about establishing these boundaries, and what impact did it have on your relationships?
T: Establishing boundaries was tough but necessary. I had to be honest with myself and others about what I needed in terms of support and acceptance. I remember having several difficult conversations where I had to assert my needs and stand firm in my decisions. While it meant losing some relationships, it also made room for new, more supportive connections. It was a process of learning to prioritise my well-being and surround myself with people who genuinely supported and uplifted me.
WF: It’s inspiring to hear how you’ve created a supportive community. Can you tell us more about the library program and its impact on local LGBTQIA youth?
T: The library program was designed to create a safe and inclusive space for young LGBTQIA individuals in our town. We offer various activities, including discussion groups, workshops, and social events. The goal is to provide a platform where young people can connect with others who share similar experiences and access resources that support their journey. The impact has been profound—many participants have expressed how much it means to have a place where they feel understood and accepted. It’s been incredibly rewarding to see this program foster a sense of community and belonging.
WF: Your work in both gardening and community support is truly commendable. How do you balance your professional life with your community involvement, and what does a typical day look like for you?
T: Balancing work and community involvement requires careful planning. On a typical day, I start with my work at the nursery, where I focus on designing and maintaining sustainable gardens. Several afternoons and evenings each week, I dedicate time to volunteer work and community activities, such as organising events at the library or participating in local fire school so I can be on call as a volunteer firefighter. It can be a busy schedule, but I find that each aspect of my life complements the others. Gardening provides me with a creative outlet and a sense of peace, while community involvement keeps me connected and grounded.
WF: It’s wonderful to see how your different passions intersect. Do you have any advice for others who are navigating their own journeys of self-discovery?
T: My advice would be to be patient with yourself and to approach the journey with curiosity and compassion. Self-discovery is a continuous process, and it’s okay to take your time. Surround yourself with supportive people who encourage your growth and celebrate your authentic self. And remember, it’s through understanding and accepting yourself that you can create a life and spaces that truly reflect who you are.
WF: Thank you so much for sharing your story and insights, Tyler. Your experiences and wisdom will surely resonate with many of our readers, especially those on their own paths of self-discovery.
T: Thank you, Wyllow. It’s been a pleasure discussing my journey and hopefully offering some encouragement to those who are exploring their own paths.
Tyler’s journey from a small-town upbringing to discovering his authentic self offers a compelling perspective for gender-fluid folks and women navigating their own paths of self-discovery. His story illustrates the courage it takes to embrace one's true identity and the profound impact of creating spaces that reflect our genuine selves. For those in the gender-fluid and female communities, Tyler’s experiences underscore the importance of self-acceptance, boundary-setting, and building inclusive spaces where everyone can thrive. His dedication to both personal growth and community support serves as a powerful reminder that our unique journeys contribute to a richer, more compassionate world. May Tyler’s story inspire you to explore your own path with confidence, embrace your true self, and make a meaningful impact in your own community.