Forming good, forward-motion habits has been a lifelong goal and one I am still working on. I'm not a complete mess, but neither am I where I want to be. I have dreams of being one of those relentlessly productive people, up with the birds and a cup of something caffeinated in hand. I would sit down with a laptop or a notebook and crank out Many Posts before starting my day.
That has never once happened.
I'm not a morning person. I hit my best streak at around 3pm. I can function before then. The world demands it of me. But my best hours are from 3pm until about 1am. Understanding that has been the first step in improving how I move through my day.
I've also had to admit that I am highly distractible. It's been said in many different ways: Writers love nothing so much as not writing. A generalization, I know. A large percentage of us will do almost anything to avoid facing the blank page. For myself, once I get going, I keep going. It's getting off the starting line that can be a problem. I will Spring clean the house, reorganize my desk, and run errands, all while planning to get to that list of stuff to write. Understanding that has been the second step. Much like a toddler who needs to be chased around before bed to wear him out, I've learned to wear out my procrastination. Clean the house. Run the errands. Remove all excuses in a swift, orderly fashion.
But there's always something else. There's social media, which (for a variety of reasons) I can't get rid of. That's a black hole I can languish in happily for hours. The endless scroll. The reward centers pinging every time something funny pops up. There are two phone games I have become rather addicted to. Instead of reading as I used to, I've been playing mindless games before bed. This helps shut the brain down, right? Wrong. I find myself dreaming of them. And so, just before I started writing this post, I deleted both games. Poof. Gone. There are far better ways to spend that time. Understanding where I am letting myself wander has been step three.
Of course, one can spend too much time pondering and planning. I create elaborate notebooks for tracking projects. It's time well sacrificed. I work better in a place of serenity and beauty. But I also had to learn when to stop. Lists and notebooks and calendars only work if you do more than build them. You have to follow through. Understanding... well, I think you're with me.
Perhaps the most difficult part of all this has been trusting my own voice. Imposter's Syndrome runs rampant through modern life - the feeling that we're not good enough or not as good as the next guy. It can suck the creativity and productivity right out through your heart. Are you waiting for me to say that's the last step? Nope. That is an ongoing battle I still haven't conquered. But awareness of it helps. Using it helps. Doing all of this for me, not the next guy, helps the most.
I am a work in progress. Building healthy habits is a work in progress. I have found and discarded more tactics than I care to admit to. But I've stopped looking at them as failures. They are just pieces that didn't fit.
If you are one of those powerhouses who has your day locked in and you're cranking out content, I commend you and I'm a little bit jealous. Good for you! But if you're not, allow me to offer a couple of suggestions:
Find what doesn't work and set that aside
Find what is distracting and decide if you really need it (you might - that's okay!)
Find what does work and nurture it
Be kind to yourself every step of the way
That last one is the most important.
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