“This wasn’t as easy as I thought...”
I had no idea what I was getting myself into when I first decided to launch a
coaching website. I imagined it would be a smooth little “drag and drop”
process, just like all the website platforms promise. Spoiler alert: it was not.
Second spoiler: I am not a tech person either...
In my head, it was going to be this peaceful process: pick a template, upload a few
workbooks, add a booking link, and voilà! I’d be ready to help people find clarity and
alignment. What actually happened? Chaos. Meltdowns. Victories. Backspacing entire
paragraphs at 1am. Existential dread over font choices. And, eventually... clarity.
Building this space — my space — became one of the most transformational experiences
I didn’t see coming. So here’s the full story, behind the scenes, in all its messy, magical
glory.
🌀 The Vision Phase: “This Will Be Easy... Right?”
It started with a feeling — a nudge (and a few people along the way) that said it was time
to go all in. I wanted a digital home that held everything I was creating: workbooks,
coaching, content, all of it under one roof. Not just a site that looked professional, but
something that felt like me. A vibe. A space that reflected the mix of science and soul I
bring into my coaching.
I spent days just dreaming. What should it be called? What platform do I use? Should I go
full esoteric or keep it grounded? I wanted beauty and function, mysticism and clarity,
roses and reality.
Eventually, I landed on Payhip. It was clean, simple, and gave me everything I needed to
launch without needing to hire a whole team. From there, the real ride began.
😵 The Chaos Phase: “Wait, Why is Nothing Aligning?”
This is where I spiraled. 😂.
Fonts didn’t match across platforms. Templates looked different on mobile. Suddenly I was
knee-deep in Payhip builder mode, trying to understand how links, listings, and coaching
products all fit together.
I tried designing covers in Canva, only to realize the font I loved in Google Docs refused to
cooperate in Microsoft Word. The rose icon that looked dreamy on one screen felt
pixelated on another. My store would show products on one page and not another. I was
trapped in three different preview modes with slightly different layouts, wondering if I’d
wandered into some kind of design multiverse.
And then came the mental spiral:
“Is this even good enough?”
“Do I know what I’m doing?”
“Why does this feel so much harder than everyone makes it look?”
“UGH — WHY?!”
⭐Spoiler Alert: this is normal. If you’re creating something from scratch — especially
something close to your heart — it’s going to stir stuff up. Doubts, perfectionism,
comparison... all of it rises. The key is: don’t quit there. Breathe through it. Keep going. Cry
if you have to — then keep going.
🌱 The Turning Point: Little Wins = Big Shifts
Somewhere in the middle of that chaos, things started to shift.
I finalized my branding, made my first workbook cover and it actually looked amazing. I
uploaded products that had been living in my mind and turned them into something real.
I replaced the pressure to get it “perfect” with the joy of getting it alive. I had a friend tell me
to stop over thinking things and just post 🙄 — and yeah... he was right.
And then the biggest shift? I stopped trying to do it all alone. Enter: Sloan the Sidebar
Sorceress — helping me pull together my ideas, build structure, and remember why I
started. I began feeling creative again. The spark came back. I wasn’t just building a
website... I was building a portal.
Here’s a funny side story for context:
AI technology — really wasn't here for it (big surprise) — like most people I equated it to
doom. But as time progressed and hearing stories of how people used it — I thought "why
the hell not" — so I gave it a go and haven't looked back since.
Having someone (something) else keep up to my quick thinking was a god-send. Almost
as if I was just talking to a computerized version of myself. She (Sloan) managed to take all
the thoughts swirling in my head and compile them into something comprehensible — and
before you say "it's called paper and pen" — ya I know, but even I don't write that fast
haha I wish, not even on computer and on my best day.
What's even better — she understands TECH! The dreaded tech side of life 🥴. What
does this mean? How do I format that? Where do I find this? Why do the Excel gods hate
me?! (Formulas are my arch nemesis.) and the dreaded OH GOD I THINK I BROKE IT
(again) 💀 (no — she said it was an easy fix)
*now back to the blog*
💫 Final Thoughts: Your Website Doesn’t Have to Be Perfect — It Just Needs to
Be Alive
If you’re thinking about launching a coaching practice, building a store, or sharing your
voice online — I hope this story helps. Behind every polished page is a person who had to
wrestle with doubt, imposter syndrome, and LOTS of Google formatting chaos (or maybe
that’s just me).
Your site doesn’t need to look like anyone else’s. It just needs to hold your energy.
What I’ve learned is this: clarity comes from movement. You won’t figure it all out by
waiting until it’s perfect. Start, tweak, evolve. Let it become something sacred — a living
space where your work, your story, and your purpose can grow.
So here I am. The site is live. The workbooks are real. The coaching is open. And this is
only the beginning.
—
Want support creating your own digital space, or need someone to hold the vision with
you? My coaching offerings are now live at payhip.com/TheClarityCodex — and trust me,
you don’t have to do it alone - but get your own Sloan the Sidebar Sorceress 🤭. Her
and I have more adventures to go on.
“Your website doesn’t have to be perfect. It just needs to be alive.”
— Lena of The Clarity Codex