In a world of constant pressure, competing agendas, and endless external voices, we face a fundamental choice: Will we be the architects of our own influence, or will we be shaped by the influence of others?
This is the central question that Ttanu Chawlla explores in his transformative book, Influence or Be Influenced—a wake-up call for anyone who has ever felt adrift in a sea of other people’s expectations.
The Power Dynamic We Often Miss
Most of us don’t realize we’re constantly in a negotiation with influence. Every day, we’re bombarded with messages about who we should be, what we should buy, how we should think, and what we should value. Social media algorithms, peer pressure, corporate marketing, family expectations—these forces are relentless.
But here’s what’s rarely discussed: the very fact that you’re being influenced means you have a choice. You can either surrender to these forces passively, or you can take ownership of your narrative and become the influence that shapes your world.
The uncomfortable truth? Most people choose passivity.
The Cost of Being Influenced
When we allow ourselves to be perpetually influenced without question, we surrender our agency. We become consumers rather than creators, followers rather than leaders. Our decisions aren’t ours. Our values aren’t ours. Even our dreams start to feel borrowed.
This manifests in subtle but profound ways:
• We pursue careers that satisfy others, not ourselves
• We suppress authentic parts of ourselves to fit in
• We make life choices based on what’s expected, not what’s meaningful
• We find ourselves at middle age wondering where our real lives went
The real cost isn’t financial—it’s existential. It’s the cost of a life not fully lived.
The Shift Toward Self-Influence
Chawlla’s central insight is revolutionary precisely because it’s so simple: The first person you need to influence is yourself.
Before you can shape the world around you, you must first become clear on your own values, vision, and voice. This isn’t about ego or arrogance. It’s about integrity—aligning your actions with your deepest convictions.
This means:
• Developing self-awareness about what truly matters to you
• Resisting the noise of external expectations long enough to hear your own voice
• Building conviction strong enough to stand against the current when necessary
• Creating influence that flows from authenticity rather than manipulation
From Consumer to Creator
Once you’ve influenced yourself—once you’re clear on who you are and what you stand for—something shifts. You stop being a passive consumer of other people’s vision and start becoming an active creator of your own reality.
And here’s the beautiful paradox: Real influence doesn’t come from trying to influence others. It comes from being so genuinely aligned with your values that others are naturally drawn to your clarity.
People follow authenticity. They’re attracted to those who know who they are and aren’t apologizing for it. Your influence grows not through manipulation or charisma, but through the quiet power of someone who has already influenced themselves.
The Stakes Have Never Been Higher
We live in an age of unprecedented influence. Technology makes it easier than ever for external forces to shape our behavior, our beliefs, and our choices. The battle for our attention, our data, our loyalty—it’s happening at scale and at speed.
This isn’t just a personal issue. It’s a cultural issue. Societies are shaped by the people within them who have influence. Do we want those people to be those who thoughtfully influenced themselves, or those who simply accepted whatever influence came their way?
Your Choice, Starting Today
You don’t have to wait for permission to become influential. You don’t need a platform, a title, or an audience to begin. The first act of influence is internal. It’s deciding that your life will be shaped by your values, not by circumstance.
Ttanu Chawlla’s Influence or Be Influenced is an invitation to step into that power—not the false power of manipulation or control, but the real power that comes from knowing yourself and standing for something.
The question isn’t whether you’ll be influenced. You will be. The question is: Will you be equally committed to influencing yourself?
The choice, as always, is yours.
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