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Welts on Your Butt a Calf Could Suck

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Welts on Your Butt a Calf Could Suck

Reflections on Faith, Family, and a Farm Kid’s Life

By Tom Brand


Now available to order!


Pull up a chair, pour yourself something to drink, and settle in for stories that feel like home.

In this warm and witty collection, Tom Brand takes readers on a ride through rural life, where life lessons show up in the barn, on the backroads, at the dinner table, and in the middle of snowstorms. Whether it’s training pigs to race, flipping through hymnals with family, or realizing your childhood print shop is now a museum, every story is grounded in grit, gratitude, and good humor.

Perfect for readers who:

  • Grew up in small towns (or wished they had)
  • Have ever used baling wire for something it wasn’t meant for
  • Believe that wisdom is best delivered with a wink and a story


From the joys of first snowfalls to the lessons learned at the feet of grandfathers, this book reminds us that the ordinary moments—when remembered well—become extraordinary.


What you’ll get:

  • A 6" x 9" softcover book with over 50 heartfelt, funny, and deeply personal stories
  • Beautiful line art illustrations scattered throughout
  • A dose of nostalgia, wrapped in a whole lot of heart


Whether you're gifting it to your dad, your neighbor, or keeping it on the nightstand for your own quiet reads, Welts on Your Butt a Calf Could Suck delivers more than just stories. It delivers the reminder that life’s best moments don’t have to be big to be meaningful.


Book Title: Welts on Your Butt a Calf Could Suck

Author: Tom Brand

160 pages

ISBN: 979-8-9987046-0-4