You have a perfect right to look after number one.
Without good health and a good life how can you do anything for the other person? are you not worth setting at least as a high priority as the other person? would the other person not say no to you given the same conditions as yours?
In this blog you'll learn about 13 things you should say "NO" to, and how to do it with feeling guilty.
If you don't feel like reading, you can enjoy the video bellow or watch it on YouTube
- Negative Self-Talk: Your words create your reality when you keep telling yourself things like I'm not good enough or I always mess up you start to believe it this kind of thinking can really mess with your confidence and hold you back from trying new things, instead try to be kinder to yourself talk to yourself the way you would talk to a friend. If a friend was struggling you wouldn't say you're terrible at this right? you'd probably say it's okay you'll get get better with practice. Doing this helps build a more positive mindset. Over time you'll notice you feel more confident and capable. You deserve to be treated well especially by yourself. Be your own cheerleader not your worst critic.
- Unhealthy Relationships: Being around people who constantly bring you down disrespect you or make you feel bad about yourself can seriously affect your happiness and well-being. These relationships drain your energy and can make you doubt your self worth. Instead focus on surrounding yourself with people who uplift and support you. Healthy relationships are built on mutual respect trust and positivity, they make you feel valued and understood. It's okay to walk away from relationships that hurt you. You deserve to be in relationships that bring out the best in you and make you feel good about yourself.
Related Topic: Stop Questioning Your Worth
- Living in Fear: Fear stops you from chasing your dreams and doing what you love, it can feel like you're trapped keeping you from trying new things and limiting what you can do. Instead of letting fear control you try facing it one step at a time. Start small like speaking up in a meeting or trying a new hobby, each small victory helps build your confidence. Remember that being brave doesn't mean you're not scared it means you take action even when you are. When you stop letting fear hold you back you can start living a life full of new experiences and real happiness.
- People-Pleasing: When you constantly try to make everyone happy you end up neglecting your own needs and boundaries. Respecting yourself is the first step to earning respect from others. If you always give into requests you might feel resentful and lose sight of your own principles, this can make it harder for you to speak up. Share your opinions and assert yourself. People pleasing can also affect your work life. You don't have to respond to every email right away or attend every After Hours event. Setting boundaries is crucial for your wellbeing, it's not about being rude or uncaring, it's about maintaining self-respect and ensuring you don't get taken advantage of. By saying no when it's needed you're showing that you value your own needs and limits. This approach helps you stay true to yourself while still respecting others.
- Toxic Positivity: Feeling bad is okay, you don't have to be positive all the time. While I don't think you should pretend to be the ultimate positive person all of the time, I do think we should not feel like we have to be. Toxic positivity can exist in many aspects of our lives, it's more than just saying to ignore the feeling of being jealous or overwhelmed, it's also about how people share their work, if we show all the highlights it's only representing half of the work being done, letting some low lights shine through is okay and can make a difference. It's okay to share the low lights that could help Inspire others to keep trying or give a different perspective.We strive for balance all the time time it's important to share that side of us too.
- Comparing Yourself to Others: Comparing yourself to others will only end up putting you down. It can steal your self-confidence and bring your self-esteem to the ground. Trying to be like someone else won't work because everyone's strengths and weaknesses are different. You should compete with yourself to be better than you were a day ago, a month ago, or even an hour ago. Knowing that you are improving yourself one step at a time is what should give you motivation. You are striving to be better for yourself and for no one else. For this to happen, you must not compare your weaknesses with someone else's strengths. Keep in mind that you have amazing capabilities. No idea is impossible for you. Don't try to be the best at something; try to be the best for something. Each moment of your life is meaningful, and even if the place you are in right now doesn't seem perfect, appreciate that you have the chance to work toward amazing new things. It is okay to respect people and admire their work, of course, but making comparisons and asking yourself, "Why can't I do that?" should no longer concern you. Give yourself time and let them inspire you to become a better person. Everyone is different. You have to find your own way and not try to be somebody you see.
- Over-Commitment: It's easy to feel overcommitted and burned out from doing too many things and saying yes to too many people. Most of us help because we want to, not because we have to. As we feel more successful and gain self-confidence, we often pile more on our plates. We forget that being successful means choosing the things we want to do very carefully. Successful people turn down a lot of good things in order to stay focused and achieve great things. Use your limited time to work on what's important to you and what will bring you the biggest results. Only say yes to things you really want to do because time is one of the most valuable assets you have. Saying no to something might disappoint the person making the request. This is the primary reason we agree to do too much. Realize something very important: this disappointment does not last. In a short period of time, the requester will forget your no, but you will have to live with the time commitment you made and the effect it will have on other opportunities. As a general guideline, think about whether you would really contribute to the person's happiness in the long run. If the answer is no, you are only making someone happy at your expense, and you have the right to turn the request down.
- Living in the Past: How many times have we all been down, trying to think back into the past to the things we've been through or accomplishments we've made? How can you realistically enjoy the things you have today if you are living through your memories? Creating new and exciting experiences gives you the time to look forward to the future. That is what makes life worth living. Always living in the days gone by just leads to depressive thoughts. The older we get, we should take full advantage of the time left in our lives to keep things enjoyable, maybe even more so than all of the years earlier combined. We should learn from our past experiences; it is the only way we will benefit in the future. We learn from our mistakes, but if we always dwell on them, it seems like we are self-depreciating individuals. Let others remember you for the person you are now. You cannot change what you were 10 or 15 years ago. You can only build upon those experiences and make the best of it now.
- Victim Mindset: When we find ourselves feeling like victims in life, it is usually because we are struggling with our own expectations. We demand that reality be one way, and when it turns out to be the opposite, we are hurt, offended, and even angry. All of this pain arises simply from expectations and nothing else. However, maintaining such a mindset means that you are entirely at the mercy of the external world. Things are not always going to go your way in life, nor is everyone else going to behave exactly as you would like them to. When we are upset that things are not what we expected them to be, our minds constrict, and we adopt a victim mindset. In a very real sense, we become prisoners of our own expectations. When we feel entitled, we are miserable. The world owes us nothing. If we think that it does, then we will be forever struggling in life.
- Isolation: We need people. We feel better when we share smiles, laughter, and even our worries with others. We don't have to face life's problems alone. There are people who care, people who want to help, and people who understand what we're going through. Life is better when we share it with others. Good times are even better, and bad times are easier to handle when we have someone by our side. Saying no to isolation isn't easy. It's a skill we have to learn, much like learning to walk or ride a bike. Often, it's about knowing when to step away from the shadows and let people in before we become too distant. Let's step out of the darkness and be brave enough to reach out and let others in. Life is too short to spend it alone. We deserve to feel the comfort of friends, the joy of shared experiences, and the support of those who care. So take that step, open that door, and let the light in.
- Overthinking: There are times when your mind will want to evaluate, compare, and dwell on the same thought over and over again. Yes, it can be helpful and can help uncover other aspects, but when overthinking, you are playing with anxiety. At this moment, pause and think: is this thought process leading to immediate action? If the answer is no, it's time to shut your mind up and channel your thoughts constructively because it helps you move on in life. When you are too involved in overthinking, sometimes you tend to end up thinking negatively. The only answer to negative thinking is some positive action. Potential activities that you could opt for could be painting, listening to unwinding music, reading a book, or having a shower. A mind focused on doing any activity will help it ease out because it is thinking alternative, constructive thoughts with no room for worries. With time, your mind will learn to worry less.
- Fear of Change: If you say no to change, you will never say yes to growth. All of us want to grow, yet when the opportunity for growth presents itself, what do we do? We resist, make excuses, and procrastinate. Say no to your fear of change. In the end, we regret the chances we don't take, the conversations we refrained from having, the friend we haven't spoken to for far too long, the struggles we were too afraid to face. The compromises you are not willing to make will become regrets in the end. Change is scary, but it's also important. Nothing changes if nothing changes. It's how we learn and become so much better. Staying in your comfort zone means missing out on all the opportunities. Embrace change, take risks, and don't be afraid. Even if it feels uncomfortable at first, you'll see that it leads to a fuller, richer life.
- Living Without Purpose: When you don't have a clear sense of direction, you will absolutely get lost and feel overwhelmed. Living with purpose means knowing what you care about and working towards it every day. It guides your actions and keeps you focused on what's important. Without it, you will feel like you're just drifting through life. Find your purpose. It will give you the confidence to say no to anything that doesn't fit your true path.
Saying no allows you to protect your time, energy, and well-being. By rejecting things that don't align with your goals and values, you create space for what truly matters. Each no brings you closer to a focused, purposeful life.
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