I’m gonna be real with you, a lot of the things that keep us unhappy, bitter, and broke aren’t random. They’re patterns we get stuck in, sometimes without even realizing it.
I’ve been there. Mad at life, blaming everyone else, wondering why nothing was working out for me. It took some tough lessons for me to see that I was holding myself back more than anybody else was.
Here’s what I’ve learned about what keeps us stuck… and how we can finally let go and be better for ourselves:
1.
Living in the Past
Replay mode is comfortable, but it’s also deadly. Whether it’s a heartbreak, a betrayal, or something you regret, living back there only keeps you hurting.
What I had to learn: Forgiveness isn’t about letting people off the hook, it’s about letting yourself off the hook so you can breathe again.
2.
Blaming Everybody Else
It feels good to say, “They hurt me. They left me. They did me wrong.” But the truth? That blame keeps you powerless.
What I had to learn: I can’t control what happened, but I can control what I do next. And that’s where my power started coming back.
3.
Constant Comparison
Scrolling, watching everyone’s highlight reel, thinking you’re behind. That’s a quick way to drain your joy.
What I had to learn: My journey is mine. Their success doesn’t mean my time won’t come, it just means I have to stay locked in on my process.
4.
Talking Down to Yourself
If you keep telling yourself “I can’t,” “I’m not enough,” “I’ll never be…,” your life will believe you.
What I had to learn: Start speaking life over yourself, even when you don’t feel like it. You don’t have to be perfect, just willing to see yourself differently.
5.
Staying Around People Who Drain You
Sometimes it’s not you, it’s the company you keep. If your circle is full of gossip, complaining, and drama, you’ll eventually get sucked in.
What I had to learn: It’s okay to outgrow people. Love them, but protect your space and peace.
6.
Avoiding the Work
Waiting for motivation, waiting for a sign, waiting for everything to line up, it’s all just waiting.
What I had to learn: Small, consistent steps changed my life way faster than waiting for the “perfect time.”
7.
Not Healing Your Pain
This one hurt to face, I was carrying stuff from years ago and letting it control my mood, my relationships, and my dreams.
What I had to learn: Healing is ugly sometimes, but staying bitter is worse. Go to therapy, journal, pray, whatever it takes to release that weight.
8.
Making Excuses Instead of Plans
“This is just how I am.” “I’ll start next week.” “I don’t have the time.” Yeah, I said all that too.
What I had to learn: Excuses don’t build a better life. Even the smallest step forward is better than staying still.
Real Talk
You don’t have to stay stuck. You don’t have to stay bitter. You don’t have to keep living a life that doesn’t feel good.
You deserve joy, freedom, and peace but you’ve got to start choosing them, even when it’s hard.
Start with one thing today. Forgive. Make a plan. Take a small step. Speak something good over yourself.
It’s not about being perfect, it’s about being better for you.
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