"My baby is 6 weeks old and constantly grunts, kicks her legs and moves around in her sleep. She only sleeps with or around me and I can’t get any sleep whatsoever when she’s doing this.. sometimes she does well with a swaddle but for the most part she hates them. She doesn’t do this when she naps during the day.. only at night. I need some advice because this is wearing me out."
This is the urgent cry of many mamas around the globe; you are not the only one. I am talking about children who have been co- sleeping with their moms from firth and are now up to five years old! When I had my kids, I always at first for the first 1-2 years had them sleep inside my room but in their crib. I must say this has worked very well for me.
After one year old they were able to sleep with their older sisters in their bunk beds. I do have a family member who has co- slept in the same bed with her daughter, my niece since birth and is asking how to get her to sleep in her own bed. I can see this is very frustrating for her because if she wants to snuggle under my brother her hubby; she is often interrupted and has to go into her room to watch her fall asleep.
Are you experiencing the same problem? I have put together some wonderful tips you can try and I am going to help you solve this problem for you once and for all. So lets dive in!
Introduction
Some parents prefer to share a bed with their children. This means that their baby spends the majority of the night in the same bed as an adult, Some parents prefer to sleep with their baby in other locations. Whatever you choose mam is perfectly fine. Its a personal choice.
Co-sleeping with a baby can benefit new parents in a variety of ways, including getting that all-important night's sleep, as it often helps the baby fall asleep faster and encourages them to sleep for longer. It can also be a great way to connect with your child if you're at work all day, but it's a difficult habit to break.
That is one of the reasons why I never started out where me and my baby slept in the same bed. I studied the dispositions of both the mother and baby. I could see me and my baby getting closer and closer and not wanting to separate eventually. I never wanted to chance that because I knew in the long run it would be too difficult. Lets give you your bed back.
Step 1. Begin early
Prepare baby early for what is to come
The longer you stay in the habit the longer and harder it will be to break. Toddler behaviors are more prone to be affected as they grow older, so researchers recommend putting them in their own room before the age of three. Otherwise, you risk making the transition more difficult for both of you – and you don't want to become too comfortable.
Step 2. Once you make up your mind do not change it
Every parent who co- sleeps with their child will have a struggle when trying to wean them off. It will be a challenge Make sure that you stick to it no matter what. Many parents can find themselves saying they are going to do it but when they see the startling tandrums of their little star, they postpone it.
Step 3. Begin slowly
The change may need to be gradual at first, but that's fine. Learning how to stop co-sleeping with a baby can be a delicate process, so doing so slowly will help to make this transition easier – for both you and your baby. However, this is not a small job, so enlisting the help of the entire family will make those night shifts kind of easier to bear.
You can gradually begin moving the cot further and further away. This will help them to get used to having their own special place to sleep.
Step 4. Stay consistent
You must be consistent when deciding how to transition a baby from co-sleeping to crib. Babies don't understand time or sleep patterns at this age, and switching between co-sleeping and cot will confuse them. However, making a plan (one that you and your partner agree on) will ensure that everyone understands the routine and the "rules." So don't tamper with their bedtime routine – keep it consistent or things will get kind of out of hand.
Step 5. Keep your bed off limits
No matter what your bed is off limits to your little star
Keeping your bed off limits for the first few months is of great importance to ensure that your baby does not get confused. Keep your bed a no, no option when baby take you there.
Step 6. Once they are adjusted- Let them enjoy the new environment
Once your baby is familiar with the gradual transitioning, continue until you get them to lure into the new environment. You might need to sleep with them for some nights to help with the adjustment. After about two weeks they should be getting used to the change. Remember adjusting can be difficult and does take time.
Step 7. Allow baby to sleep in their crib during naptimes
Nap times are excellent trials for your baby. Here is the opportunity for baby to get used to the environment . This makes the night transition a little easier.
Step 8. Put baby down when between sleep and wake
This is so they will still be aware of what is happening. Let me warn you, your child might still be moving up and down frequently at this time. Don't mind this hold out to the end and keep trying.
Step 9. Prepare and plan some comfort cues
This one just might work for you
Here are a few ideas:
- Sounds: Whether that’s a white noise machine or a series of familiar sounds that can help them fall asleep, but can also be a source of comfort when they move into their own space. I used calming music like instrumental kids bible songs and stories which my kids really enjoyed.
- Your scent: Try giving them something that smells of you can help them to adjust, while still having the comfort of “you” being near them – making them feel more secure in your absence. Perhaps cut up an old blanket, t-shirt or even a cuddly teddy bear? Find something that they know smells like you.
- Lights: From night lights to coloured lights that they can familiarize themselves with when in the other room.
Step 10. Try a mattress for the bed sleepers
Transitioning to a cot or crib may be difficult for your youngsters who co- slept in a bed. Stick to a small one and see how it goes.
Step 11. Let them participate if they are older
If they are older and can make decisions; allow them to help with deciding with their room decor -wall stickers and themes. They might even want a special moral character in their room like veggie tails, smells, colors. You can also spend fun - time with them but do not sleep with them.
Step 12. Try some wool
A wool blanket can work wonders
Wool, as a natural material, draws moisture away from the skin, keeping your child cool when it's hot and warm when it's not.
Even better, this process creates a clean sleeping environment that keeps dust mites at bay and fights off sniffly noses.
If you've followed our advice on how to stop co-sleeping with a baby and are still having problems, contact your doctor for help.
Many exhausted parents tell me that although co-sleeping may have seemed like a good idea at one point, they recognize once entrenched in the never ending pattern that the opposite of a restful night sleep occurs and in fact, co-sleeping creates additional stress for the entire family.
Dr. Kate Roberts
According to recent studies, a near epidemic proportion of children are now co-sleeping with their parents. According to Parenting's MomConnection, 45 percent of moms allow their 8- to 12-year-olds to sleep with them on occasion, and 13 percent allow it every night.
Step 13. Help your growing tween
Communicating with your tween is one of the best things you can do
Mamas don't fall into this category where your tween ( age 9-12 years) is sleeping with you on a regular basis.
Signs that you should intervene include: he used to sleep fine in his room but now wants to sleep in your bed; he climbs in with you in the middle of the night; and he begins complaining of physical symptoms (such as a stomachache) as bedtime approaches.
If your co-sleeping child appears unusually stressed at night, or if you've realized you need more privacy, here's how to reintroduce him to his space:
1. Talk about it
Explain that adults must have their own space at night, and that most kids his age do as well.
2.Enjoy their favorite book
Read with him in his room (avoid popular choices, such as anything scary or horrifying!). Find a positive book that builds character Kids on a mission to shine here
3. Let their listen to some music
It is important that you guide your child into positive music to listen to
Allow him to listen to instrumental music on an MP3 player or portable CD player. I played bible stories or the bible via DVD and I sat is my kids room when they had difficult falling asleep. And do you know it worked? After about a week or two they were set free.
4. Prepare your tween child for weaning
Tell your child that this week you'll sit with him for 15 minutes before bed, and next week you'll stand at the door for 15 minutes. You'll be down the hall the following week, and so on. (It's a trick commonly used to get a toddler out of your bed; fortunately, it works faster with tweens.)
5. Create a bedtime routine
6.A good environment can help!
Create a relaxing pre-bedtime routine. Doing the same things every night, such as reading a book or taking a shower, is soothing in the same way that his / her bed/bath/book routine was when he was younger.
Conclusion
So there you have it mama. As you can see many parents are struggling with this issue. You are not alone This can be very frustrating causing you to loose your bed space and room. You deserve a break mama. Break this habit and do not let it go to the tween years because it only gets worse and harder.
Remember God loves you so much .
Let Him know about every struggle you are facing.
I hope some of these 13 steps help you out. Let me know in the comments what you are struggling with, what has worked for you, and what has not. Thank you for stopping by and do visit again. If you have questions or comments feel free to ask or comments.
13 Powerful Steps Guide to Stop Co-Sleeping and Reclaim Your Bed Again
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