Do you ever feel lost or like something’s missing? Looking for a book that feels like it understands you? That feels like it's been written just for you? I wrote an ebook that is made for those moments, made to help you grow, see things differently, and find meaning in life’s ups and downs. Check it out, you'll never regret.
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Give yourself more love. It’s really that simple. Love is the foundation of a life that feels good, flows, and is enjoyable. Like the sky above, there is an endless supply of love. It’s always there, waiting for us to feel it. Think about it. Would you argue with the sky and insist that it's not really there embracing you when you walk outside and feel the sun on your skin? That would be sort of crazy, right? Stop arguing with the abundance of love that’s here and allow yourself to simply feel it on the inside without any intellectual dialogues. Let go of the self-judgments, self-criticism, and disapproving self-talk. These lies have nothing to do with who you really are.
What Is Self-Love?
At the beginning of my self-love journey, I struggled to articulate exactly what self-love was. I had read countless articles and blogs about people who spoke of having found self-love, but when I reflected on my own life, I could not say, with certainty, that I knew exactly what they were talking about. Self-love was a vague term that was thrown around rather haphazardly. I had always believed that I was someone who loved himself and who held himself in high esteem. To an extent, I did... but what I found was, for the most part, I sought and found my value in other people's eyes and in pleasing other people. I came across what was possibly the simplest, yet most accurate, definition of self-love I'd ever seen. It was something along the lines of this: "Self-love is the practice of understanding who you truly are and allowing yourself that truth." To break this down further, the practice of self-love involves getting rid of everything and everyone else's explanation of who they believe we are, who they want us to be, or who they need us to be. In doing this, who we begin to meet, some of us for the first time, is our real authentic selves. It is the understanding and accepting of our true selves that we become. Post self-loathing beliefs and ideas we had about ourselves have been pushed out and are replaced with deep appreciation, respect, and love for the person we are. It is the embracing and understanding of whom, in all our positive and negative, weak and strong, fabulous and messy glory, we are to allow our divine selves to shine through the outer layers that have been constructed to appease others. Finally, self-love is allowing us that truth by not continuing to allow behaviors or actions that compromise or are not aligned with who we truly are or who we are growing to become. It's allowing us the chance to not just exist... but to thrive.
Benefits of Self-Love
You will be surprised by how much better you feel. It all begins for you when you start loving yourself. This transformation also happens at different levels: physically, mentally, emotionally, and spiritually. There are various ways of manifesting self-love, and these are different for every person. What is key is that you show yourself this love. There are a myriad of ways that practicing good self-love can benefit you: 1. When you practice self-love, you become happier, more content, and generally look forward to what tomorrow brings. You develop a positive outlook on life. 2. When you love yourself, you have a higher level of confidence. You believe in who you are and what you stand for. It becomes easier for you to make decisions. 3. When you begin showing yourself love, you start to prioritize your activities and develop healthier habits. 4. You begin to get a better understanding of who you are. You become more comfortable in your own skin and are aware of your strengths and areas needing development. 5. You develop the strength to go against the grain if you have to. 6. When you love yourself, you attract more love into your life, not just from others but from your own self as well. 7. When you practice self-love, you realize that you are quite worthy of being treated justly and considerately. This prevents and keeps away people who are emotionally draining or abusive.
There are simple, everyday ways to start loving yourself more. Let’s look at a few of them.
1. Spend Time with Yourself
Sometimes we forget that being alone is a chance to connect with ourselves. It’s not a punishment; it’s a gift. Sit with your thoughts, enjoy your hobbies, or just be. Whether you like reading, painting, or even taking a walk, give yourself time to enjoy your own company. The more time you spend with yourself, the more you’ll see how much you have to offer.
There is no such thing as an ordinary or an average human being, but I believe that an ordinary or average person can acquire the taste for solitude, and that this is the main avenue to self-knowledge, which is the main avenue to wisdom. _Be The Glow: Life's Big Questions
2. Learn to Say "No"
You don’t have to say “yes” to everything just to please others. Saying "no" when you need to shows you respect your time and energy. It’s okay to put yourself first sometimes. Saying “no” doesn’t make you selfish. It just means you’re taking care of yourself.
3. Be Present
Being present means paying attention to what’s happening right now. Whether you’re talking to someone, eating, or just sitting quietly, try to really experience the moment. When you focus on the present, you’re giving yourself the gift of peace. You stop worrying about the past or the future and start enjoying what’s right in front of you.
4. Stop Comparing
We all do it. We look at someone else’s life and think they have it all together. But what we don’t see is the whole picture. You’re on your own journey, and comparing yourself to others only takes away from your own progress. Embrace who you are and trust that you’re exactly where you need to be.
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5. Be Honest with Yourself
It’s easy to lie to ourselves to avoid facing the truth. But being honest with yourself is a way to grow. If something’s not right, admit it. If you’re feeling off, acknowledge it. Self-honesty lets you understand what’s going on inside and helps you make better decisions moving forward.
6. Be Kind to Yourself
When you mess up, be kind to yourself. It’s easy to get angry or disappointed, but you wouldn’t talk that way to a friend. Treat yourself with the same kindness you’d offer to someone you care about. No one is perfect, and mistakes are just part of life. Show yourself the same compassion you’d show others.
7. See Mistakes as Lessons
Mistakes are not failures. They’re opportunities to grow. Instead of beating yourself up over them, look at what you can learn. Each time you make a mistake, you’re one step closer to becoming the person you want to be. Mistakes help you grow stronger and smarter.
8. Forgive Yourself
Everyone has regrets. We all have moments we wish we could change. But holding on to guilt only hurts you. Forgiving yourself frees you from the past and gives you the chance to move forward. Let go of the things that weigh you down and start fresh. You deserve to be free from self-blame.
9. Take Care of Your Body
Get enough rest, eat foods that make you feel good, and take time to move. When your body feels healthy, your mind and spirit feel better, too. Treat your body with the love it deserves, and it will show you the same love in return.
10. Handle Stress in Healthy Ways
Stress is part of life, but it doesn’t have to control you. Find simple ways to manage it, whether that’s through deep breathing, a hobby, or taking a walk. When you handle stress better, you feel calmer and more in control of your life. Taking care of your mental health is just as important as taking care of your body.
11. Write Your Thoughts Down
Journaling is a great way to sort through your emotions. It doesn’t have to be perfect, and it doesn’t have to make sense. Just write down what’s on your mind. Writing helps you understand yourself better and can give you a sense of clarity. It’s also a great way to track your progress and see how far you’ve come.
12. Practice Gratitude
Gratitude shifts your focus from what’s wrong to what’s right. Take a moment each day to think about the things you’re grateful for. Maybe it’s a kind word from a friend or a moment of peace in your day. Focusing on gratitude helps you appreciate your life more and makes it easier to love yourself.
13. Get Outside
Nature has a way of calming us. Spending time outside, even if it’s just for a few minutes, can help clear your mind and bring you back to the present moment. Whether you’re walking in the park or sitting outside, nature reminds you that you’re a part of something bigger and that everything will be okay.
14. Talk to a Professional
Sometimes, we need someone to help us see things clearly. A therapist can help you understand your feelings, work through difficult emotions, and find ways to cope with life’s challenges. Therapy doesn’t mean you’re weak, it means you’re strong enough to seek help and take care of your mental health.
Final Thoughts
How about using this easy-to-do and very effective exercise to recharge your energy when you are not feeling confident? Take three minutes as the minimum time for doing this exercise the first time. After you are more experienced, you'll manage to get the effects of a 30-minute nap in only one. When you feel the pride of being who you are and feel this toward other people as well, you realize that an essence is shared among us all. Begin with someone you love and who is alive. Very gently, in your inner world, say "I love you" to this person, feeling all the love you can within yourself. Then, very gently send a feeling of love towards that person, feeling the person as someone who exists and will always exist in this world. Now bring to your mind someone you love deeply and who has already died. Tell him or her silently "I love you" and very gently send a feeling of love towards that friend, feeling that person as someone who exists in the bosom of eternity. After doing this, become aware that this feeling can work wonders in this person's life. Make a conscious decision to keep in mind always that it is love that keeps everything together and afloat. Rise from your chair very slowly, making original moves that you've never done before, and get to work.
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